Twisted Reflection
by solitaryloner
Summary: Ever since young, Miku has been haunted by dreams and hallucinations of a boy that she had never once met. When he really, suddenly appears in her life, he alone holds the key to Miku's mysterious past, but how can Miku talk to someone who seems more dead than alive? And what will she do, if she happens to fall in love with her hallucinations? Which boy should she choose? LenXMiku.
1. Chapter 1

_''You'd like that, wouldn't you?'' he whispered, his hands reaching out for her. Crimson liquid trickled down his blonde hair as he smiled, a twisted smile, and she stared, uncomprehending at him._

_What was all that red, staining his hair, his skin, his hands? Slowly, slowly, the red dripped, and it fell on her skin. It was cold. Why was it cold? Wasn't it supposed to be warm?_

Miku Hatsune touched her mirror, and she felt the cool glass, smooth against her fingers. Her green eyes, haunted looking, stared back at her from her mirror, and hesitantly she brushed her finger against her reflection's cheek. The image in the mirror did likewise, copying her every movement.

Sometimes, Miku wondered whether her reflection was really an image, cast by light, or whether there was another world, behind her mirror. Perhaps the image wasn't her reflection - perhaps Miku herself was.

Maybe all of them didn't exist. Maybe they were all twisted, warped reflections. Maybe they were the ones trapped in the mirror, trapped in a parallel universe. It wasn't like anyone could ever find out.

Sometimes, she thought she saw, out of the corner of her eye, another being in her mirror. Just behind her reflection, there would be a flash of bright blonde hair, and when she looked around there was never anything there.

The flash of blonde would disappear once she returned her gaze to the mirror, and she would wonder if all that she had seen was a mere trick of the light. A hallucination, perhaps?

Her eyes flickered up, and once again she saw that bright flash of blonde. Her eyes widened - this time, she could vaguely make out a shadowy figure behind her. A girl? A boy? She couldn't be sure, but there was _someone._

''Who are you?'' she whispered, watching the lips of her reflection part, asking the question back to her. The shadow disappeared, and she rubbed at her eyes, unsure if her mind was playing tricks. She hadn't been having enough sleep lately - nightmares kept waking her up.

There was always one particular nightmare, one that affected her the most. The one with the boy, the boy with the blood-stained blonde hair, and how he reached out to her, begging her to save him. But she didn't know what to do. She didn't understand, and he continued pleading for her until she woke up.

She didn't know who that boy was. She had never seen him before, had never laid eyes upon someone who even _resembled _him before, yet this boy kept reappearing. Each time, he asked for help, though sometimes he asked questions she didn't know the meaning to.

Sometimes, he asked if she would like _that, _whatever that was. His blood would drip onto her skin, and she would shoot awake, still able to feel the cool trickles down her arm.

Why was this boy, this stranger she had never seen outside of her dreams, bleeding so profusely? What did he want from her, and how could Miku possibly help him in any way?

Miku shuddered. She didn't want to think about the boy, about the way he had woken her up from yet another nightmare. She didn't understand why his blood was cold. Shouldn't it be warm? But no, his blood was cool and dark, almost as though it was leached of life.

_Does he actually exist, or is he simply another figment of my imagination? Why...why me?_

Feeling slightly annoyed, she turned on the tap of the sink, splashing warm water on her face. Her long teal hair hung in wet tendrils around her face, and she shook her head, trying to get rid of all her thoughts. She needed to sleep. There was school tomorrow...

_I don't want to go to school tomorrow. There's nothing for me there. If it wasn't for the fact that I wanted to be 'normal', that I wanted to reassure my foster parents that I was normal, especially after the accident..._

Water dripped from the ends of her wet fringe into her eyes, and she rubbed at them. Blinking, she stared once more into the mirror, and she froze, her breath catching. Her reflection was stained red, the colour of blood.

The blonde flash was back, and she saw the figure behind her reflection once more. This time, she could make out its features - blood-stained blonde hair, tied up into a small ponytail at the nape of its neck, and dark blue eyes which were so intense, Miku felt like she was drowning in their depths. Crimson stains covered his perfect, aristocratic features.

His fingers were wrapped around her throat, but not brutally - lovingly, like someone reassuring a pet. His other hand stretched out towards the mirror, as though he was reaching out to touch her cheek. His intense blue eyes met hers, and his lips parted, saying something. She stared as his lips moved.

_Help me, _she heard his voice whisper in her ears. She whirled around, but there was no one there, no one behind her, no one but herself, all alone in the bathroom. Her eyes flickered back to the mirror, frightened, but the boy had disappeared from the reflected scene too.

The boy in her dreams...he was the one in the mirror. Behind her reflection. _I'm dreaming. I'm hallucinating. I don't know what's going on. I want to make sense of all this._

_I need to sleep. _The last thought was dazed, disbelieving. How could her dreams possibly affect reality? It wasn't possible, she told herself. There was no way that boy was real - there was no way he had shown up in her mirror, in her reflection.

She paused, staring into her own green eyes. Fear and uncertainty gazed back at her, and marginally Miku let herself relax. Yes, all was back to normal, or to as normal as it ever could be. There wasn't anything or anyone in her mirror or behind it. She had imagined the boy because she had been tired.

And her reflection, when her hallucination had appeared, had been blood-stained because she had been thinking about the blood-covered boy when she looked at herself. She had let her thoughts paint over reality. Again.

''I'm going to go to sleep and forget all about this,'' she said aloud to the mirror, reassuring herself. ''Tomorrow, I will tell Father and Mother about my hallucinations. Then I shall see a doctor, who will give me medicine, and I will no longer see things which aren't there.''

Nodding at herself, she turned and walked out of the bathroom, switching off the lights as she did so. The moment the room turned dark, she thought she could feel someone's warm breath, mixed with the scent of cinnamon, on the back of her neck, but she twisted her head around to find that there was no one there.

_I'm being paranoid. Tonight's nightmare had affected me more badly than I had originally thought...I need to get more pills. Soon._

She forced herself not to shiver and walked back to her bed. Sliding under the warm covers, she closed her eyes, feeling marginally safer. The room was dark, extremely so, and even when she opened her eyes she felt it was no different from having her eyelids shut.

When she had stayed in bed long enough to feel relaxed, to finally feel sleepy, she felt a breath of cinnamon-scented air brush lightly against her forehead. Her eyes snapped open, but once again there was no one there.

_Pills. Yes. I need to take my pills._


	2. Chapter 2

''I...I want to see the doctor again,'' Miku mumbled over breakfast, her fingers clenching into fists. Her foster parents exchanged a concerned look, staring at Miku.

''Why? Did you run out of pills?'' her mother, Luka Megurine, asked her. Miku squeezed her eyes shut and nodded, downing her glass of milk as she did so. Luka exhaled.

''I see...did your hallucinations get better, after the last round?'' she asked, concern evident in her voice. Miku opened her eyes, staring up at her pink-haired foster mother.

''For a while, yes,'' she replied hesitantly. ''Don't worry, Mother. I'll be fine...I know how to differentiate reality from my dreams.''

''Okay,'' Luka sighed. ''Gakupo? You can send her to the doctor later, right?'' Her foster father Gakupo Kamui nodded, his long purple hair tied up into its usual long ponytail. Miku shook her head.

''I can visit the doctor by myself,'' she said shakily. ''I just need the money to pay for the medicine. I've been there enough times to know how to get there by myself.''

''If you're sure,'' Gakupo said cautiously. ''I can send you there, if you want - it won't be any trouble, Miku. But if you want to go by yourself...''

''I can do that. I promise I won't start seeing things that aren't there,'' she added bitterly. Why couldn't she be normal? Why was she haunted by all these apparitions? Why wouldn't they just leave her alone?

Gakupo nodded. Reaching for his wallet, he pulled out a fifty-dollar note, passing it to her. ''Keep the change as your pocket money for this week, then,'' he sighed. ''And don't take too long.'' Miku understood why he said that - he worried that she wouldn't come home after visiting the doctor, that she would wander around town by herself, following after yet another illusion.

''I'll go to the clinic straight after school ends, then I'll come back. Don't worry about me,'' she paused. ''See you when I get back later, then.'' Miku rose from her chair, pushing away from the table. Walking out of the kitchen, she bent to pick her bag up from the coffee table in the living room. She sighed, unwilling to go to school.

Slinging the black bag over her shoulder, she walked out of the house, shielding her eyes against the bright morning sun. It was brighter than usual today, and the light hurt her sensitive eyes. She rubbed at them.

Blinking rapidly to get rid of all the bright spots which obscured her vision, she lowered her hand, then shook her head, staring in shock.

The boy standing under the tree in their front yard looked up at her. His blonde hair was matted with blood, his blue eyes dark and haunted-looking. He had his arms wrapped around himself, and he was shivering, even in the gentle warmth of the morning sun.

His dark blue eyes captured her gaze, giving her that sense that she drowning, once again. She took a slow step back, her bag hitting the wood of the closed front door. She couldn't bring herself to speak. Her mouth wouldn't work.

The boy looked startled, then took a step closer. He didn't leave the shelter of the tree, though, staying in its dark shadow. His pale skin glistened with that familiar crimson liquid, and helplessly he stretched his hand out towards her. His lips parted, but no sound came out.

Even so, she heard his voice whisper in her mind, those same three, familiar words. _Help me. Please. _His voice was pleading, soft and husky. It was laced with despair, with desperation, and she knew that she just _had _to help him. No matter what. She didn't know why, but she simply couldn't ignore him.

''How do you want me to help you?'' she murmured, and he shook his head, looking almost frustrated. He took a step into the sunlight, then retreated, flinching. He glared up at the sunlight outside the tree's shadow.

_Help..._blood dripped off his hands, onto the green grass, and she stared, transfixed by the red drops of liquid staining the green. He stared down too, eyes emotionless, then once again he reached out. This time, he beckoned to her, wanting her to walk over to him.

She hesitated, but he beckoned some more, gesturing almost frantically. She did as he asked, warily walking closer to him, and then she was nose-to-nose with this boy, this hallucination she had been haunted by since she was a young child.

He was familiar to her in that way. She had seen him, ever since she was young. He had grown as she had, and she wondered why her hallucination had grown older, though he was a mere illusion. He looked about her age, this wounded boy, and even though it had been over a decade his injuries hadn't healed. They had become worse. It was strange.

Then again, he was nothing but a illusion, wasn't he? His injuries were probably a figment of her imagination, like he himself was. Miku felt calm, despite seeing her hallucination right in front of her, instead of as a reflected image in the mirror.

He opened his mouth to speak, and this time she could hear his voice, coming from his lips. It was a soft rasp, barely audible. It could scarcely be called a whisper, it was that soft. Like the rustling of dead autumn leaves.

''Help me, Miku. Please. You're the only one who can,'' he pleaded. She shook her head, frustrated by his pleas, by what he wanted.

''How do you want me to help you?'' she returned, staring intently into his eyes. He looked down at the ground, the blood flowing down his hair to hang, uncertainly, at the tip of his damp fringe. The crimson bead finally dropped, landing on the grass.

''I don't know,'' he murmured hoarsely. ''But I know you're the only one who can get me out of this state. Won't you help me, Miku? Please? Try. That's all I'm asking for,'' he breathed.

_Why am I talking to someone who isn't even there? _''You have to tell me something else. How did you even end up in this state?''

He didn't respond to that. Instead, he brought his hand up, close to her face. His bloodied hand hovered near her skin, hesitant, and then his blue eyes flickered up to meet hers. Miku didn't realise that she was holding her breath.

Slowly, giving her time to withdraw if she wanted to, he cupped her cheek with his hand. His skin was wet and slick with his blood, and it was a curious combination of warm skin and cool liquid. His skin was surprisingly warm, like it was full of life. Unlike his blood.

''You're soft,'' he whispered. ''I've wondered, what softness was...I've wondered what you would feel like,'' he dropped his hand to his side, and she missed the sudden absence of his warmth. _He's nothing but an illusion._

''How do you want me to help you?'' she returned to the most pressing issue at hand, and he glanced up at her, his eyes capturing hers once more. She felt like she was drowning, drowning in those dark depths.

''I don't know,'' he said softly, and before she could answer he had disappeared, leaving behind nothing but the bark of the tree. Miku frowned at the strange hallucination.

_It wasn't too bad...I've had worse, _she thought to herself. Lightly, she reached up, brushing her fingers against the skin the illusionary boy had just touched. She felt something wet.

Eyes widening, she brought her fingers down to stare at them. They were stained a dark red, a red which seemed completely lifeless. A red which was cool and almost...musty. The blood of the boy, the blood which had stained his hands...his hand which had touched her.

What did this mean? That he wasn't an hallucination? That he had actually been there? No, that wasn't possible. He had disappeared, and real things couldn't just fade like that.

_My hallucinations are getting from bad to worse...I really need to see a doctor._


	3. Chapter 3

Once she reached school, the first place Miku went to was the toilet, to check that she had got rid of all the blood which was staining her cheek. Carefully, she checked that no one was using the sinks in the toilet before she went in. She shivered, glancing at the cubicles. None of them were closed - the toilet was completely empty, save for her.

The lights overhead flickered - this girl toilet's lights must have broken down again. Miku sighed. The ground floor girl toilet had lights which were always faulty. No matter how many times the school replaced the lights, they would always break down eventually. Pursing her lips, she checked herself in the mirror.

Haunted green eyes stared back at her, and she gazed into the eyes of her own reflection. She looked so lost, so sad - Miku could barely tell it was herself. Shaking her head, she peered at her cheek and smiled - yes, the bloodstains were gone. That was good.

Miku didn't need more people to see the bloodstains and immediately jump to conclusions about her. People avoided her, most of the time - she didn't understand why. Maybe it was because of that _accident, _last time - that incident which had changed her from a cheerful, bubbly little girl to someone depressed and moody. Someone tired and alone.

People whispered about her. They wondered whether she was doing anything to harm herself, since she always looked so weak and tired. Miku knew that she seemed fragile, that she looked as though the slightest puff of wind would break her into pieces. But she wasn't that weak, she knew she wasn't.

_I lived past the accident - I can survive. I will survive it. I won't do anything foolish to myself, just because people think I'm all alone. I don't cut myself, unlike what so many people seem to believe._

But yes, many students were under the impression that Miku hurt herself, due to the pains of the accident she had witnessed. Though she didn't, if anyone were to see the blood staining her cheeks, that wouldn't help in squashing the rumours.

Miku didn't understand. She left people alone, most of the time, so why couldn't they do the same for her? If they left her alone, then she would be happier. She hated that they made up these rumours about her, just because she was quiet and chose not to interact with others.

Just because she was quiet and haunted-looking didn't mean she was a masochistic creep who enjoyed hurting herself. Gritting her teeth, she stared down into the sink, then turned on the tap, watching the warm water gush.

Cupping her hands, she collected some of the water, splashing it onto her face. Everyone thought that Miku Hatsune had some serious mental issues - even her foster parents thought so. While Miku admitted that she had odd hallucinations and dreams, it didn't imply that she was _insane. _Not in any way.

She lifted her head, staring into the mirror. The lights overhead flickered once more, and in the brief period when the lights dimmed she thought she saw a figure behind her reflection, once again. Heart in her throat, she whirled around to look behind her. No one...

She brushed her sopping fringe away from her eyes, returning her gaze to the mirror. She stared at herself, with her pale skin and dripping hair - she looked like death. Sighing, she wrapped her arms around herself, flinching as she felt her own icy fingers.

A breath of cinnamon-scented air brushed her cheek, and she skittered away, heart racing. There wasn't anyone else in the toilet except for her, and the fan wasn't switched on, so where had that gust of air come from?

Her eyes flicked back and forth, between the spot she had felt the breath and the mirror. Once again, the lights dimmed, and this time they stayed dim. Bright enough that she could see, but too dark to be considered lit.

A dark shadow, next to her reflection. She swallowed, squinting at it. Carefully, she glanced next to her, but there was no one there. She returned her gaze to the mirror - the shadow was still next to her image, and slowly she began to recognise it.

His blonde hair was the most distinct feature she could make out about him, in the semi-darkness. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her reflection's waist, and her reflection's eyelids fluttered closed, her lips parting. Miku watched, transfixed, as the blood-stained boy caught the eyes of the real her. He nuzzled into the crook of her reflection's neck.

_You're the only one who can help me, _his voice was intense as he whispered into her ear. Miku was beginning to become frightened - she could hear him loud and clear, even though there was no one else in the room besides her. _I wouldn't have done this if there was another choice._

Done what? She didn't understand, didn't understand what he wanted her to do. How he wanted her to help. In this case, she was powerless, and appearing before her with those cryptic messages didn't help in matters.

His bloodied fingers caressed her reflection's cheek. _Soon, you'll understand, _he whispered, before fading away. Miku rubbed at her eyes, and then narrowed them as the lights suddenly came back on. She stole a glance in the mirror's direction - her reflection was back to normal.

It was as though all that hadn't just happened - but how could she convince herself of that? She knew what had just happened - she had gone through yet another hallucination. She nibbled on her lower lip. Clearly, she couldn't go without her pills, not if one day of no medicine brought upon such an onslaught.

But that boy...despite being incorporeal, he had seemed so real, and she couldn't help but feel that strange urge to help him, once again. It was as though she _had _to help him, like she didn't have a choice.

And why had her reflection reacted that way to his touch? What was so special about this boy? Why did he keep coming to her, and not to any other person? Was he supposed to mean something to her, her own special hallucination? Or was it something else?

The lights flickered again, making her gasp a little in fright. She cast the lights a wary look. Carefully, avoiding the mirror, she started to make her way out of the toilet.

The door of the toilet cubicle furthest from the exit creaked a little, and instantly Miku paused, fearful. She had to walk past the cubicle to reach the exit, so she finally worked up the courage to dart across the cubicle.

The door creaked open wide, and though she tried to avert her eyes, she caught a glimpse of pale skin and dead-looking, haunted blue eyes. Blonde hair stood out in the dim toilet, those familiar crimson stains marring his skin.

She gasped, her head snapping around to look. The boy? But as she stared into the cubicle, she saw that it was empty. There wasn't anything to mark his presence there, but curious she stepped closer. Her eyes widened.

A few drops of dark red stained the tiles of the floor, a dark red the same shade as the blood which had stained her cheek, earlier. It carried that familiar scent of darkness and cinnamon, and she recoiled, heart racing in fear.

Quickly, she hurried out of the toilet. Blood? That boy's blood? So he had really been there? Or not? Was he simply another illusion, as always, or should she believe he was real?

What was going on?


	4. Chapter 4

As usual, Miku sat alone during break. Everyone was frightened of her, though no one dared to admit it - everyone feared the deathly pale girl, with her haunted green eyes and lonely smile. She preferred to eat in the classrooms, so that's what she did, sitting by herself in the deserted class as she nibbled on a sandwich.

Usually, she felt fine. She felt peaceful and calm. Today, however, she was unnerved. Her hallucination had come to haunt her, not just once, but three times, since last night. She missed her medicine - she should have got more when she noticed she was running out.

But she had wanted to prove to her foster parents, and to herself, that she could be normal - that she didn't have to rely on all those pills, slowly poisoning her body from inside. The medicine she took didn't get rid of her hallucinations, but they suppressed them, and usually she wouldn't see them as much.

Thrice in a few hours was bad. The doctor had pronounced her case as 'serious' - those were the strongest drugs they could administer, and by right they should get rid of her hallucinations completely. The fact that they were subdued, but still there...it didn't speak well for the extent of her mental illness.

She had overheard the doctor whispering to her foster parents, when she had been younger. Two years after the accident which had landed her in their care, after they had adopted her from the orphanage. After that accident, her hallucinations had come, she recalled - and she had been sent to the doctor.

He had told her foster parents, in a low whisper, that she was a borderline schizophrenic, unaware that she had been listening outside. She had been eight, and she didn't know what 'schizophrenic' had meant. So she went to look it up, and after learning of it, she had to agree with the doctor.

Not only was she a schizophrenic, she could barely remember her past, before the accident. She could remember faint traces of who she was - she was Miku Hatsune. A bubbly, fun-loving cheerful little girl. But when she had woken up in the hospital, she felt anything but that. She had been so tired...

Sent to the orphanage after her recovery, she had refused to interact with the other orphanage children, and after a while they learnt to leave her well alone. She didn't want to talk to any of them, so they didn't talk to her either. She couldn't remember anything about herself - her life before the accident had ceased to exist. She was like an empty puppet.

So she didn't understand why Gakupo and Luka had decided to adopt her. Perhaps because they thought they could help her, as she tried to unlock the memories of her past. She _knew _that her memories were still there - they were hovering under the surface, just out of reach. The memories of who she once was.

If only she could reach out just a little bit further...then she could remember. She would finally be able to remember. Squeezing her eyes shut in frustration, she shook her head.

Again, she wondered why she had been adopted. Why the moody, introverted girl who hated to talk to others? Why not any one of the other more talkative, friendly children? She had never asked Luka and Gakupo, so they had never told her either. Maybe it was because they thought that they could reach beyond that cold exterior, to help the shivering child within. Miku's fingers curled into fists.

She didn't need anyone's sympathy. Or pity. She wasn't insane - she knew she wasn't. She just didn't like to talk to others. She was just someone who had forgotten herself, forgotten who she was. She was someone who had lost her memories, someone haunted by illusions and dreams. But it didn't mean that she was not sane. She was as sane as any other person.

That cinnamon-scented breath, once again. She flinched as it brushed against the back of her neck, raising goosebumps on her skin. She twisted around - and there he was, her own personal hallucination. His blue eyes regarded her knowingly as she stared at him.

''I'm glad you didn't take your medication today,'' his voice was that same soft whisper, like the rustling of dead leaves on the side walk. ''Or you wouldn't have seen me, otherwise. You would've walked right past me.''

''Who are you?'' Miku demanded, deciding once and for all to find out what the boy wanted from her. Who he was, and why he insisted on following her. Who was she to him?

''Me?'' he smiled bitterly, his lips curving up slightly. ''I'm nobody...I used to be someone, but I'm not that person, now. I'm nothing but a remnant, a fragment of something whole. And I want to become whole again.''

His answer confused her. ''What's your name, then, at least?'' she asked slowly. ''If you're nothing...but you have a name, right?''

''My name?'' he looked startled. Then his blue eyes stared down at the floor. ''My name is Len Kagamine,'' he said softly, that hoarse whisper making her strain her ears to listen. ''But I don't know if I should be called that, really. Since I'm nothing but a shard of the past.''

Her hallucination had a name. Len Kagamine. The name didn't sound familiar - she was sure that she had never heard it before, and she frowned as she wondered why her hallucination would name himself that.

''What do you want me to do? What can I do? Why do you keep appearing to me? Are you even real, to begin with?'' her voice wavered.

''I'm as real as you are, Miku,'' he murmured, his fingers reaching out, once again, to touch her cheek. ''Every bit as real as you are,'' he repeated, at the look of wariness in her eyes. ''And I want to be reunited with the other pieces of myself, so that I can be Len Kagamine. Properly, not just this shadow of him.''

''Who is this Len Kagamine?'' Miku whispered, her voice as soft as his was. He smiled, eyes woeful. There was a look of yearning on his face as he spoke his next words.

''Len Kagamine is who I am. At the same time, I am not him. I am just a part of him, a separate part. And without either of us, Len Kagamine can never be whole.'' His cryptic words made no sense, and Miku shook her head frantically.

''I...I don't even know who this Len Kagamine person is,'' she protested weakly. ''How do you want me to help you...reunite with him? I can't do that. Maybe you should find someone else.'' _And then you can leave me alone._

He shook his head, looking a little disbelieving. ''No. It's you. I know you're the one to help me, Miku,'' as her name left his blood-stained lips, she shivered. ''Look at me. Look at the state I'm in,'' he said slowly. ''I deteriorate, more and more, every single day. If you don't help me, Miku, I'll fade away and disappear into nothing. I'll die, and then it'll be too late.''

Wasn't that what she wanted? Didn't she want this illusion to stop bothering her, to leave her alone? Wouldn't it be good for him to disappear from her life? However, she hesitated. She didn't want him to just die, like that - he somehow reminded her of herself, of how she was like. Someone without a past.

''How can I help?'' she asked hesitantly, voice barely audible. He glanced at her.

''Find Len,'' he whispered. ''Find the other half of me. And talk to him. I'm sure you'll find a way. I can't go to anyone else, Miku - I'm bound to you,'' his hand clasped her wrist. ''I can't leave you. And you can't run away from me. I'm not a hallucination, Miku - believe me, I exist. I'm real. Help me. Please.''

His cinnamon-scented breath washed over her face, and once again she shivered, closing her eyes. His skin was cold, so cold - did this mean he was real, then? Since he could touch her? She felt something cool press against her lips, and her eyes snapped open, shocked. He had kissed her, a fleeting brush of his lips against hers.

''Don't abandon me. Don't leave me alone. Don't ignore me,'' he chanted, his face serious as he ran his lips over the soft skin of her cheek. ''I don't want to die and fade away,'' he ended softly, those cerulean coloured eyes filled with fear. Before she could ask him anything else, he had disappeared. She blinked.

''Len?'' she tried, the name odd on her tongue. The door of the classroom opened then, and Meiko Sakine and Neru Akita walked in. They paused at the sight of her.

''Miku? Why...why are you bleeding?'' Meiko asked quickly, while Neru just stared at her, eyes wide. Miku looked down at her arms - where Len had touched her, his fingers had left trails of blood. She looked back up, seeing traces of pity in the eyes of the two girls.

''It's not what you think,'' she mumbled, running out of the classroom. She had to wash the trails of his blood off, before anyone else saw. She didn't need to see any more pity, any more condemnation in anyone's eyes.

His blood stained her pale skin, making her remember his words, the abject terror she had seen in his eyes - _I don't want to die._


	5. Chapter 5

Miku stepped hesitantly inside the clinic, swallowing the wave of apprehension which rose in her chest. The clean, spotless, sterile white interior gave her the sense that she was doing something wrong - that she shouldn't be taking this kind of medication.

Something inside her told her that there was nothing wrong with her, that she was fine just the way she was. She wasn't mentally disturbed, and what she saw weren't hallucinations - but what could they be, other than mere illusions? It wasn't possible that the boy she kept seeing was real.

She had to see a specialist to let him determine the seriousness of her condition first. She glanced at the counter - well, usually she would have to visit a psychiatrist first, but she couldn't be bothered to do so when it was the same procedure, over and over again...she had come by enough times to know exactly what medicine she was always prescribed.

She walked hesitantly to the counter, and the woman there glanced up. She arched an eyebrow. ''Miku Hatsune? You're here for your usual medicine, aren't you?'' she queried. Miku nodded, averting her gaze, and the woman smiled. ''Okay, wait just a while. I'll get it for you, dear.'' She rose from her chair.

Miku avoided the looks of the other staff. She was rather famous in this hospital, for reasons she couldn't comprehend - every single one of the staff knew who she was. And she knew that they all whispered behind her back, talking about the ghostly girl with the expressionless eyes, the one who saw things that weren't there. The insane girl who didn't talk, the girl who preferred to sit alone in the dark.

The woman returned, passing the pills used to manage her condition to her, over the counter. ''Twenty-five dollars please,'' she chirped, and wordlessly, completely unaffected by her cheerfulness, Miku passed the money to her, then took the medicine and her change and walked out of the little clinic.

As she entered the rest of the hospital compound, she shielded her eyes against the sudden bright glare of the overhead fluorescent lights, narrowing her eyes. The glare was brighter out in the corridor, compared to inside the clinic, and she didn't like the light.

Suddenly feeling faint, she stumbled, her hand shooting to her forehead. Someone caught her arm, and she looked up cautiously, blinking spots away from her eyes. That familiar boy stared back at her, his blue eyes grave, his fingers wrapped around her upper arm. She resisted the urge to flinch away.

What was his name? He had said his name was Len...''Why is it that I'm the only one who can see you, and not anyone else?'' she asked softly, casting a wary look around to make sure no one else was around in the corridor.

''Because I'm bound to you. We're practically a part of each other. And only you can see me. I'm an extended, visible part of your very own soul, if you will,'' he smiled bitterly, his fingers tightening around her arm. ''And it is for the same reason that I can touch you, but nothing else...nothing that is alive, of course.''

''Why are you always covered in so much blood?'' Miku asked the next most pressing question, and the boy blinked at her, his dark blonde hair dripping with blood as usual.

''Because with every day that passes, Len Kagamine dies, more and more. I reflect that. I reflect his deteriorating state...'' his voice trailed off. ''I don't wish to die.''

Miku frowned. ''If you're part of Len Kagamine...if you're bound to him in such a way...then why are you bound to me as well? Who am I to you, Len? Why me, of all people?''

''I don't know about that,'' he whispered, eyes narrowing down at the floor. ''I only know that I'm linked to both of you. I am Len, but you...I don't know who you're supposed to be to Len,'' he sounded as though it was painful to admit such a thing, and she exhaled.

''Follow me,'' he leant down to whisper in her ear, causing a shiver to run through her, and before she could protest he was dragging her down the corridor, ducking into the toilet meant for the handicapped. She was startled that such an ethereal being, one who didn't even seem to be physically there, could drag her along with him using such little force.

She made a mental note to never underestimate him, and she moved to stand warily next to the small sink in the toilet, away from him. The boy stretched out a hand, and she watched with wide eyes as the door's lock slid itself closed, trapping her inside with him. ''What do you want with me?''

She assumed that he had dragged her into the handicapped toilet so that people wouldn't catch her talking to what seemed to be herself, in the corridor, and assume she was insane - which was nice of him, of course, but she couldn't push away a nagging feeling that he wanted more.

''The medicine,'' his eyes shot towards the little bag which she carried. The bag which contained her pills. ''Don't eat it. Please. If you eat it, it makes it harder to talk to you. It's harder for me to make you notice me, Miku.''

''If you're not an hallucination, then why does eating these pills makes it harder for you to talk to me?'' she demanded. She wanted a logical reason for everything - she hated not knowing. She hated being treated as though she was insane, when she knew perfectly well that she was as normal as any other person.

''Know how those pills work?'' Len stared at her coolly, his cerulean eyes blank. ''They tamper with your mentality...they decrease your susceptibility to what does not appear to be tangible. Like me. I'm not the one driving you mad, Miku - those pills are.''

''And why should I believe you?'' she asked, just as coolly. ''I don't know. Sometimes, I wonder if you're real. Sometimes, I wonder if you're a ghost, if supernatural things such as spirits really exist. Are you a ghost, Len?''

He smirked, flicking his blood-stained blonde hair out of his eyes. ''Me? A ghost? No...of course not. I'm a fragment, a shard of the past. A broken piece of someone's soul and memories. A part of someone's very essence.''

''So...you're a ghost,'' she stated. ''But a different kind of ghost. Is that so?''

He shrugged. ''If you want to believe that I'm a mere ghost, then you're welcome to it.'' His blue eyes fixed on her, trapping her gaze. She felt as though she was drowning in the depths of those haunted-looking eyes. ''But despite what you believe, Miku, I'm real. I exist.''

''I still find it a little difficult to accept that you're real when no one other than me can -''

Before she could finish her sentence, he suddenly appeared before her, shocking her so that she couldn't speak, and then he tilted her face up with his warm, slick fingers. His lips lowered, coming closer to hers, and her heart beat faster, almost erratically.

No, she couldn't possibly like the idea of kissing a blood-stained hallucination. Could she? He paused for a brief instant, as though checking himself, then his lips pressed lightly against hers, a sweet, soft, chaste kiss.

Though it was an innocent kiss, his hands were nowhere near as innocent as he trailed his fingers down, from her shoulders all the way to her waist, making her shiver. From what? Fear? Pleasure? She couldn't be sure. The kiss lasted for quite a while before he finally broke off, breathing heavily. Did hallucinations need to breathe? Could hallucinations even kiss?

''Do you still think that I'm not real?'' he asked intensely, blue eyes searching hers. She swallowed as he waited for a reply, and slowly she shook her head. He smiled, satisfied.

''I can provide another demonstration of how real I am, if you'd like,'' he teased, and she felt her cheeks warm. Her eyes shot to her arms, the skin he had caressed, and she noticed that it was covered in crimson blood trails. She gasped - she had to wash it off. Quick.

He noticed them too, and he backed away, intense gaze becoming hooded as he stared at the blood stains on her pale skin. ''I should go now...'' he whispered softly, and before she could say anything he had disappeared.

Shakily, she turned to look at the mirror, at her own reflection. He didn't appear in the mirror, as he sometimes did, but proof of his appearance lingered behind on her body.

Her normally pale lips had been stained red. Stained dark crimson, with his blood.


	6. Chapter 6

Miku was on her way home, after getting her medicine from the hospital clinic. She had promised her foster father that she would go home straight after buying her medicine, and she wasn't going to break that promise.

Len...had kissed her. And she had liked it. It had taken her a while to completely wash off all of the blood stains. She had washed the blood staining her lips off last, and she had watched as the dark red faded from her mouth, her lips returning to their usual pale pink.

She didn't understand what Len wanted from her, still. How was she supposed to find his...other half, wherever he was? Talking to him just opened up more and more questions, each one more confusing than the last - most of all, why was it that he was bound to her?

A question that Len himself didn't understand, a question that he didn't have an answer to, either. She sighed, lifting the plastic bag her pills were in, regarding the medicine with a critical eye. So should she take it, as she ought to? Or should she believe her hallucination and not eat them? She shook her head, looking away from the bag.

She walked home with her eyes downcast, thinking about everything which had just happened to her. Should she believe Len? Or should she not? He was an illusion, after all...though she was starting to wonder if he was real. He seemed so very...real. So alive.

Miku puffed her cheeks out. Maybe she should have asked Len about her past. Since he claimed to be bound to her soul, would he know anything about her missing past? Next time she saw him, she would ask him. It couldn't be mere coincidence that she had started seeing him after the accident...or had she?

She couldn't remember. During the accident, she thought she had caught a glimpse of dark blonde hair and cerulean eyes - but had it been Len? Had he appeared, even then? She hissed, her hand shooting to her forehead as pain suddenly bloomed at her temples - her head was hurting. She couldn't recall...

She could only remember the accident, and what had happened after that. For an entire decade, she had been haunted by this boy she didn't recognise...she had spent two years in an orphanage, talking to Len, and everyone had thought that she was insane for that. Because no one else could see him. Because everyone thought she was talking to herself.

Should she believe logic and common sense, or should she believe what her eyes were telling her? Should she believe that he was a mere hallucination, or should she believe that Len was really there, touching her, talking to her? That he really was, as he said, an extended part of her soul, something that no one other than herself could see?

She was lost deep in her thoughts, so deep that she didn't notice it when she walked right into someone. Her head snapped up as she skittered back, eyes widening. ''I'm sorry!'' the words came out of her mouth automatically, without her having to think about them.

''It's okay,'' the boy she had walked into said softly. Miku glanced at the boy, then felt her breath catch. Dark blonde hair, twisted into a ponytail, midnight blue eyes which were haunted-looking. Perfect features, a face which was so handsome it could be considered beautiful. He was hauntingly familiar, and she knew who he was. It was...Len Kagamine?

But where was the blood? Where was the blood which always stained his skin? And why did he suddenly seem so very...solid? Her lips parted, and then she choked out, voice filled with utter shock, ''Len?'' The boy blinked, startled.

''How...do you know my name?'' he asked haltingly. Miku stared at him - how could he not know her? He was the one who haunted her, he was the hallucination who kept talking to her. He was the one who just simply refused to leave her alone. How could he possibly not remember who she was...

Was this the real Len? The Len that her hallucination kept asking her to find? She blinked, her thoughts racing - then it meant that she really wasn't hallucinating. That Len Kagamine did exist, and that he had asked for her help in finding his...other half. The other half which was currently standing before her.

And this Len clearly had no idea who she was. He probably had no idea how she knew his name - did he even know that he was missing a part of himself? No, she doubted he knew. She didn't want him to think that she was insane or anything like that, so she smiled at the boy. ''I thought you looked like someone I once knew,'' she chirped. ''I didn't expect the two of you to have the same name,'' she added.

The boy's expressionless face didn't change, though Miku knew her feeble lie was pretty unbelievable. ''Coincidence, I suppose?'' he murmured. ''My name's Len Kagamine...what's yours?'' he asked, in that same halting way.

''I'm Miku Hatsune,'' she hesitated. ''Are you new here? Where do you live?'' She was very sure she had never seen this boy around her before. Not in the flesh, at least.

The boy tilted his head in the direction of the house they were currently standing in front of. Miku glanced at it, then drew back in surprise as she realised that it was directly opposite hers. ''You stay opposite me.''

''Really?'' he smiled briefly. ''That's great,'' his dark blue eyes met hers. They were as haunted as ever - as haunted as the hallucination she was used to. ''I'm attending the high school nearby, too...do you study there?''

She nodded. ''I can show you around when you come into the school, if you want,'' she offered. ''When are you going to come for class?''

''Tomorrow. I've been around here for a week already...'' he hesitated. ''It's just that I didn't really step out of the house, much.'' He glanced away from her. ''You're the first person I talked to, ever since I moved here.''

Miku smiled, a little hesitantly. She still wasn't very good with talking to strangers, and speaking to someone new always made her feel nervous. ''I hope you like it around here, Len,'' she mumbled. ''I guess...I'll see you around?''

She turned to walk away, but he stopped her, his hand resting lightly on her shoulder. She shivered - his touch was cool. As cool as the other side of him, the hallucination she knew. ''Why do you seem so familiar? Have we...have we met before?'' he asked slowly.

She shook her head, and he sighed, pulling away from her. ''Sorry. Must be my mistake,'' his eyes lingered on her curiously, before he turned away and walked back into his house.

Miku quickly crossed the road, back to her own house. Letting herself into the front yard, she locked the iron gates after her, then closed her eyes, sighing. So she had found Len Kagamine. By sheer accident and luck. What was she supposed to do, now that she had found him?

''You need to convince him that there's a part of him missing. Me. That I'm missing from him. Half of his soul is gone. You're the link between the two of us. That's why you're familiar to him, though the two of you have never met...''

She whirled around, her eyes flying open. Len, the blood-stained Len, was standing there, his face both serious and amused, at the same time. Strange, that the hallucinatory Len was more emotional than the real Len was - the boy she had just met seemed rather...dead. Her illusion was standing under the shade of the tree, like he had been this morning.

She approached him, as she knew he wanted her to. His fingers reached out, wrapping around her wrist as he tugged her closer to him. ''Thank you,'' he breathed. ''I can be whole again. Soon. I know it,'' his dark blue eyes met hers, and she blinked, realising something.

''There's less blood all over you, now,'' she commented. He laughed quietly, his eyes softening as he stared down at her.

''Because, now that I know where my other half is, my health and appearance has ceased deteriorating. The closer I get to being united with him, the closer I am to becoming whole, the more I'll heal,'' he brushed his hand against her cheek. ''I don't think I'll die, not anymore.''

''Why does he seem so dead?'' she asked, admittedly rather bluntly. Len tilted his head, the amusement in his eyes still there.

''Because I'm missing,'' he replied matter-of-factly. She stared at him, confused, and he smiled at her. ''Don't probe, Miku.'' His fingers ran through her teal hair. ''Do you know how long I've watched you for?'' he breathed. ''I'm not surprised that he recognises you...I'm not surprised that you spark interest in him.''

She didn't understand him, and he sighed, ruffling her hair. ''It's not important,'' he said quietly. ''Just...just talk to him, okay? One day, you'll figure out how we're connected. What I am, who he is, and why you're bound to both of us. And when you find out, you'll remember your past, as well.'' Her eyes widened - how had he known that she had wanted to ask him more about her own mysterious, elusive past?

Swiftly, he kissed her on the cheek, before he faded away into the rough bark of the tree. Miku let her fingers drift up to her cheek as she contemplated what Len had just told her.

Her cheeks felt warm, to her touch.


	7. Chapter 7

Len Kagamine sighed as he tilted his head, staring blankly out of his window into the clear blue skies outside. Another town. Another life. A chance to be someone he was not.

As always, he felt empty, as though something was missing from him. He was searching for something...someone...anything. Anything which could fill the deep void within him, anything which could make him feel whole. Complete.

He was eighteen, but he didn't feel like he was. Wasn't eighteen the age where people were supposed to be...alive? He didn't feel as though he was part of this world. There was this invisible glass barrier, fencing him in, keeping him away from anyone else who might want to try and talk to him, the quiet loner.

Sometimes, he felt invisible. He was someone who stood, silent and unnoticed, by the pavement as everyone else walked past him. He was the faceless face in the crowd, the person that people glanced over and forgot in the next instant. He was someone who was just...there. Something about him made people forget him, and he wondered why that was so. Why was he just so forgettable?

Maybe it was because he was too lifeless. He was too dead...too emotionless. He had retreated into himself, someone who stood alone in a corner and watched others, but never participated in anything. However, try as he might, Len could never force himself to seem interesting, to seem like any other human being. He just couldn't make himself be very noticeable or particularly memorable, and that irked him a little. He was just...different.

Too different from everyone else, so different that no one tried to talk to him or remember who he was. What his name was. His fingers reached up, pressing lightly against the smooth cool glass of his window. His lips curved up into a slightly bitter smile - he used to be well-liked, to be included. Now he was just forgotten. Someone who lived in dreams and the past.

When he had been six, he had suddenly...changed. Len had to admit that, though he didn't want to. He hadn't wanted to change, to suddenly be different, but he had changed in the end, and until today he still didn't understand why. He recalled the day he had changed - he had woken up, feeling bright and chirpy as he always did. He had gone out with his parents, and then...he had witnessed an accident.

He had been in a shopping mall with his parents. And a fire had suddenly broke out, on the same floor he was on. Perhaps it had been a faulty electrical circuit, or a naked flame placed far too near to flammable oils. He would never know the cause of the fire...not that it was particularly important, anyway. Len had been separated from his parents, and he had panicked, trying to find them as the smoke slowly filled the shopping mall.

Firemen had been trying to evacuate people out of the building, but they hadn't seen him, a young little boy stumbling around lost in the mall. Perhaps he had been a stupid child even then, but he hadn't known that the fire, the flames, were dangerous...he had wanted to look for his parents, so he had went around calling, almost sobbing out for them.

He had searched desperately, a little lost boy in a burning building, running away from the firemen who tried to take him away. His parents had always told him not to talk to strangers, so he had avoided them. The firemen. They were strangers, so he didn't talk to strangers. He had just wanted his parents.

And then he had seen two large figures, huddled together, near the window of a jewellery store. The glass window of the store reflected the dancing orange flames. Thinking that it might have been his parents, he had approached them, and to his disappointment it hadn't been his parents - it had been two teal haired adults, seeming to search for another person, just like Len was. Their eyes met, and then the woman's eyes widened.

Len had heard a loud creaking noise, and then with wide eyes he looked up. A piece of the ceiling had been falling, the white plaster on fire, and he had watched with wide, uncomprehending eyes as the plaster hurtled towards him. He hadn't understood that he was about to die, that he would be crushed, so he had just stood there, waiting for the plaster.

The teal haired pair rushed towards him, pushing him out of the way. The plaster, instead of hitting him, had fallen right onto the pair, crushing their bodies as fire instantly singed their skin, the pale white turning fiery red. Len backed away from the inferno, blinking and shaking his small head in shock.

A shrill scream had then sounded from behind him, and startled, confused, he turned around, looking for the source of the piercing shriek. He hadn't understood what had just happened before his very own two eyes - he didn't understand that the teal haired couple had sacrificed their own lives to save him, the innocent little child, from the falling plaster.

He hadn't known what was death, at the time. But the little girl, staring horror-struck at him, apparently knew. Her green eyes were wide as her hands shot to her mouth, and she looked weakly from her parents, twisted and crushed under the rubble, to him, shaken but alive. The flames had been reflected in her large green eyes, the orange dancing and flickering.

Ignoring him and the roaring fire around them, she brushed past him to the rubble, the smoke making her large green eyes well up. Or perhaps the tears were those of sadness, as well. As Len watched her crying over the bodies of her parents, he had been struck by a sudden sense of guilt...and he had turned and fled.

Blindly, he had made his way to the exit, where the firemen then helped him outside. They had asked if there was anyone else still inside, and wordlessly he had nodded. The firemen then rushed back inside, and Len was then smothered by his parents with relieved hugs and frantic kisses, meant to soothe.

But though he had his parents to comfort and protect him, the little girl had none. For Len then realised what was death, something he had heard of but never really understood. And he somehow knew that the girl's parents were never coming back, that they would never comfort her, ever again. The little girl was now all alone, her parents gone forever.

Len, up to this day, had no idea what had happened to the little girl in the mall. He didn't know whether or not she had escaped the burning building, or whether she had died in there, the same way her parents had. But the sense of guilt never left him, not ever. He had caused the death of two people, perhaps three...and even if the girl survived her parents had been taken away because of him.

It would stay with him for all eternity, he knew that. This never-ending guilt would always plague him, would always torture him. He would never be able to forget the debt he owed this nameless couple - if it were not for them, he would have died, crushed under the rubble.

It should have been him who died, not two innocent people who had done nothing but be there at the wrong moment. Len should have died for his foolishness and utter idiocy - but he hadn't. The strangers, whose names and identities he hadn't even known, had taken his place on Death's list, instead.

Two strangers, looking for their daughter, had thrown away their lives just to save him. A stupid, thoughtless, reckless child who hadn't escaped from the burning building when he had the chance. If he had left, if he had went outside...then perhaps the couple would never have died. And he wouldn't have to keep remembering the girl's desperate, sad eyes.

Those eyes haunted him at night, the large green eyes of the little girl, brimming with tears as she stood away from the fire, watching the flames lick away at her parents' skin and teal hair. Hair the same shade as hers was. The pain and sadness in them...it was overwhelming, and whenever those eyes settled on him he felt like he was going to suffocate from the desolation in that stare.

The girl whose parents had died saving him. He had to know whether or not she was still alive. It had become a life mission, of sorts - he was determined to find her...then apologise to her. How he would find her, he didn't know - he didn't even know how old she was - but he would find her, somehow. Some way.

He knew that no apology he gave to her, gave to anyone, would ever make things right for her, but it might help a little, at least. Provided she was even still alive. Had she managed escaped the burning mall? Or had she died and left the mortal world, to follow her parents?

Len leant his forehead against the cool glass, his eyes closing. After the accident at the mall, he had changed. He had become the lifeless shell he now was, and try as he might he couldn't become the Len he once had been.

There was just something missing, some spark which was now lost to him. He no longer seemed alive - he had lost the vibrancy of youth. He was...dead, now. Barely alive anymore. He wasn't physically dead, but he felt lifeless. Like he was the walking dead. He deserved to die for causing the deaths of innocent people.

That girl he had just met, outside of his house...what was her name? Miku Hatsune? She was the first person Len had ever talked to, in this neighbourhood - and he found himself hoping that they would be friends. He hadn't had a friend in a long time. He hadn't wanted to befriend anyone, in what seemed to be an eternity. He was always alone, but he now wanted to know this girl better.

Actually, he hadn't felt this small flutter of hope in his chest for a long time, either. He was used to feeling dead and numb to the outside world - but now, things were different. He actually felt that brief spark of...hope, rushing through him. Something he hadn't felt in a long time.

She had teal hair, which was the main reason Len had been willing to talk to her. Usually, Len kept to himself, preferring not to talk to others - but her teal hair had reminded him of that little girl he owed such a debt to. And she was pretty, too...he just felt that he _had _to talk to her. Something about her lured him in. Something about her told him to talk to her, gave him the urge to get closer to her - even through the numbness of his shell.

And she had called his name. She had called him Len, even before he had a chance to introduce himself to her. Her lie hadn't been particularly convincing - after such a long while of dead numbness, Len was extremely logical. He found it ridiculously easy to tell when people were lying to him. He operated purely on logic.

So...if she had been lying to him earlier, then how was it that she had known his name? And did her teal hair give her any connection to that little girl he had seen in the mall, twelve whole years ago? Was she the sad little teal haired girl he had always been searching for?


	8. Chapter 8

Miku shot awake, breathing hard. Letting out a small whimper, she turned around, burying her face in her soft pillows. Same nightmare...the flames, her parents, lifeless green eyes staring blankly at her. A glimpse of blonde hair and frightened blue eyes - but she couldn't really remember that part clearly...the blue eyes, though, she could remember.

Midnight blue, filled with fear. And bright blonde hair. She couldn't remember who it was, who the boy had been...but was it possible that the boy she had seen, at the scene of the accident, was Len? Blonde hair. Blue eyes.

Something cold touched her shoulder gently, and she flinched, shuddering. Quickly, she flipped back around, retreating from the cold. Her searching eyes met dark blue ones, filled with concern. It was Len. His eyes were strange - occasionally the dark blue of a midnight sky, at other times the soothing blue of a summer sky. Come to think of it, the colour of his eyes appeared to depend on the time of day.

It was night, so his eyes were dark. ''What happened?'' he asked softly, leaning over her. There was less blood, once again - there used to be so much, the blood could collect in his hair and drip from it, as though he had just taken a shower in the cool red liquid. Now, it stained his skin, but it no longer flowed freely.

''A nightmare,'' she breathed, heart still palpitating in her chest. ''A really scary nightmare,'' she admitted, this time in a softer voice. His fingers ran through her hair soothingly, and he leant his forehead against hers. Blue eyes met her own, soft and warm.

''Tell me about it,'' he murmured, his warm lips a mere few inches away from hers. She blinked at his unexpected closeness - she thought she could feel her heart flutter in her chest, and this time it wasn't from fear. Focusing on him and his words, she pushed the feeling aside.

''I dreamt about the day I lost my parents,'' her voice trembled, and she hated that. She didn't want to appear weak and needy, especially not to this boy, but her voice continued to quiver, completely disregarding her wishes. ''The fire...engulfing their bodies. It's the earliest memory I have of myself. Anything before that, I can't recall,'' she sighed, this time in disappointment. His eyes widened a little.

''So the earliest memory you have of your past is...the death of your parents?'' Len asked curiously, and slowly she nodded, still unwilling to face that fact. She wished she could recall more of her past...but every time she tried, a foggy barrier seemed to block her memories. She couldn't remember anything about herself, about who she had been, what she was like.

''That's...unfortunate,'' he mumbled, seemingly at a loss for words. Miku smiled sadly, closing her eyes as she felt his soft lips brush lightly against her forehead. Was he trying to comfort her? ''But I'm no different, I suppose,'' he continued, voice turning distant. ''I don't have any memories other than those of you.''

She opened her eyes, startled. ''If you're a part of Len, then shouldn't you...shouldn't you share his memories, as well? Since you're a shattered fragment of his soul?'' she asked. He sighed quietly, withdrawing from her to stand next to her bed, and she sat up, watching him.

''Logically, theoretically, that is true. But...I can't recall anything about him, either. I only know that I'm not whole, that I am a part of him.'' He cocked his head, a thoughtful expression in his eyes. ''The earliest memory I have is the orphanage. When I first met you. It's like...it's like I was born, then, at that very moment. And now, my memories and his are separate.''

''So you can't sense how he's feeling, or know what he's thinking, or any of that?'' Miku asked wonderingly. All this was fascinating, albeit in a slightly morbid way. He shrugged.

''Before? No. Now, after seeing the physical vessel of Len, the other half of me...'' he hesitated. ''I get flashes sometimes. Of what he's thinking, how he's feeling, things like that. But I don't know anything about his past unless he specifically chooses to think about it.''

''Does he know that you're missing from him? That...there's part of him that's separate from himself?'' She slid her long legs out of bed, swinging them back and forth as she stared inquisitively at the bloodstained boy.

''Not really,'' Len answered absent-mindedly. ''He feels odd at times, I suppose? Empty. Like he lacks the kind of youthful spark and vibrancy that eighteen-year-olds should have,'' his lips tilted up into a wistful smile. ''But he doesn't know that he's missing some of himself, not specifically. So...to answer your question, no.''

Miku frowned, nibbling upon her lower lip. If Len didn't know that he was shattered, then how was she supposed to convince him otherwise? Would he think that she was insane, just like how so many other people believed? Or...would he trust in his apparent hollowness and believe her? It was hard to decide.

''Maybe you should spend some time with him, get to know him first,'' Len suggested now, seeing the concerned look on her face. ''He and I...we are the same person, but we have completely different personalities. I don't know how he'll react, if you tell him about me.''

''I suppose,'' Miku pouted, then sighed wearily. ''You don't know why you're bound to me, do you?'' He shook his head, almost regretfully. ''I wonder why me?'' she mused. ''Is all this...is it linked to my lost memories, somehow?''

''Perhaps,'' Len admitted casually. ''It's too much of a coincidence that I showed up in your life only after the accident,'' his blue eyes softened in sympathy. ''And I'm sorry for the deaths of your parents...not that anything I say will make you feel better,'' he slid closer to her, running his long fingers through her rumpled hair.

She glanced up at him - he was so handsome, with or without the bloodstains that marred his otherwise flawless skin. And he was concerned about her...he had shown up when he heard her wake up from her nightmare. She felt a smile tugging at the edges of her lips. Hesitantly, she reached up, fingers stroking his face.

His blue eyes closed as a soft moan escaped his lips. She blinked in surprise, reaching up to brush his bright blonde hair away from his forehead. His hair was silky and soft, despite all the blood in the individual strands, and she felt him shiver a little at her touch.

''Len?'' his eyes didn't open as he made a small noise of acknowledgement. ''What do you think about me?'' she asked, this time in a small voice. At that question, his eyes blinked open, his long eyelashes fluttering. There was surprise in their dark blue depths.

''Why do you ask?'' he replied slowly, sitting gingerly next to her, at the edge of her bed. They stared at each other, both of them quiet as Miku struggled to think of a good answer.

''I'm just curious,'' she said, a little lamely. ''Because if you and Len are similar...'' she hesitated. ''If you...like me, then maybe Len would too. Maybe it'll be easier for me to talk to him, then,'' she ended in a rush, feeling her cheeks warm. She averted her gaze from his startled expression, heart in her throat.

Why was she just so nervous? Long fingers tilted her chin, and then he turned her back to face him. There was humour on his face as he grinned teasingly at her, and she swallowed, wondering what he was about to say.

''I've known you since you were six,'' he whispered, voice silken and mesmerising. ''I've watched you for over a decade...and I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel anything for you,'' his other hand gripped her wrist, causing her to gasp. His gaze was intense. ''I don't know how many nights I stood by your bedside, watching you sleep. Maybe it was creepy...but I couldn't help myself,'' he smiled shyly.

''Don't you need to sleep?'' she asked breathlessly. Miku winced as she realised how idiotic the question sounded. An amused light shone in Len's dark blue eyes as he regarded her curiously, his fingers still tilting her face.

''Not really. I sleep when I'm bored - but I preferred to watch you,'' the words slipped out quickly, as though he was embarrassed to admit to it. His pale cheeks turned a little pink - he seemed so vibrant. So alive. Nothing like the shattered fragment of soul he was supposed to be - he seemed...more than ghostly.

He seemed more alive than Len did, which was strange. Miku pushed the thought aside, thinking about his words. Her cheeks warmed even further - Len leant his forehead against hers once again, their gazes searching each other's for something. Something unknown.

''So...you do like me?'' she hedged, blushing furiously. She wanted to hear him say yes, wanted to know exactly how he felt about her - because she was falling for a hallucination. She was falling for him, even if she was the only one who could see him, and she wondered whether he felt the same way...or if he put up with her only because she was the only person who could see him. Who could talk to him.

Warm lips covered hers, a sweet, innocent kiss. She felt her eyes close as he dropped his fingers from her chin, sliding up the side of her face to her cheek. His other hand tightened around her wrist as he tugged her closer to him, his mouth nipping playfully at her lower lip.

She gasped as he tugged gently on her bottom lip with his teeth, and before she could do anything else he slid his tongue inside her mouth, exploring her mouth with his tongue. She felt herself soften and relax - she hadn't realised that she had been tensed - and she whispered his name quietly, against his lips.

He pulled away, breathing hard, watching her intently. ''Say my name again,'' he murmured, voice almost a plea. And she did just that, ending with a soft little moan. He hissed, before claiming her mouth once more, this time with an added ferocity. She fell back, pulling him along with her, and the whole time their kiss didn't break, searching and hungry.

She needed him, almost as much as she needed air to breathe - gasping, she drew away, and he continued kissing her, moving down from her lips to her neck, to her collarbone. ''Len,'' she twined her fingers through his blonde hair, not minding the way his blood stained her skin - almost as though he was marking her as his.

His lifted his head to stare at her, his eyes darker than ever with...was that lust? ''Do you still wonder about my feelings for you?'' he rasped, his body hovering over hers. She was trapped beneath him, and the near proximity of his warm body made her ache.

She shook her head, no, and the lustful look in his eyes faded, his lips curving up into a sweet smile, caring and affectionate. ''I love you,' he whispered, nuzzling into the curve of her neck. She shivered. ''It's hard not to fall in love with you,'' he mumbled. ''When you're so sweet...so innocent. So soft,'' he stroked her shoulder teasingly, and pouting she jerked him off.

''Don't worry about Len,'' he said reassuringly, sitting up, finally releasing her from the warm press of his body. ''If I fell for you...he probably would, too,'' but Miku didn't miss the little hint of doubt in his voice. How similar were the two of them? Would Len fall for her as well?

''If he really falls for you, I don't know whether or not I should be jealous,'' Len now mumbled moodily, sulking a little. His lower lip quivered, and Miku smiled at his childishness. Sitting up, she leant her head against his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his waist. He glanced back at her, eyes soft, and slowly he covered her hands with his own.

''You shouldn't. The two of you are one and the same person, after all,'' she said quietly. He laughed, resting his chin on the top of her head. She closed her eyes, clinging on to him.

''I guess,'' his voice was pensive. ''Miku? Would you mind...'' he hesitated. ''Would you mind if I sleep with you tonight?'' he asked quickly, as though he didn't want to ask the question but couldn't bring himself to stay silent.

She considered, not saying anything, and she heard him sigh. ''Never mind then,'' he said, sounding a little defeated. She tightened her arms around him, and he made a tiny little noise of surprise. Miku opened her eyes, staring up at him pleadingly.

''Len...don't leave me tonight. Please.''


	9. Chapter 9

Miku groaned, not wanting to wake up for school. She turned around, pressing against something warm, and she smiled, snuggling closer to the warmth. It felt nice.

She felt something tighten around her, and she sighed, feeling strangely protected. There was a faint answering sigh, and then she felt something brush against her forehead. Lazily, she opened her eyes, blinking as her gaze met cerulean coloured eyes. He grinned.

''Good morning, sleepyhead,'' Len teased her, once again pressing his lips to her forehead, lingering a little this time. Miku pouted and pushed him away, and he smirked at her, his arms still wrapped tightly around her waist.

''Pushing me now?'' he sighed dramatically. ''And just a while ago, you were nuzzling into my chest. Your contradicting actions greatly confuse me, Miku. But I love you anyway.''

She blushed as he said that. ''Shut up, Len,'' she turned away to hide her reddened cheeks. Sliding out of bed, she walked into her little bathroom to brush her teeth, and as she walked away she could hear Len, laughing behind her.

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She walked out of the house after bidding Gakupo and Luka goodbye. They looked rather relieved today - Miku suspected that it was because they could tell that she was in a good mood. Len strolled along beside her, visible to no one other than herself. She wondered whether he was going to follow her all the way to school today - why was he walking, anyway? He could usually appear wherever he wanted.

Her gaze flicked up as she closed the door of the house behind her. Len Kagamine had just left his house too, the house opposite hers...her eyes widened as their gazes clashed and met. She smiled, a little uncertainly at him, and he smiled back. Her eyes darted to the Len standing beside her - he was frowning.

She decided to ignore him. Walking closer to the road which separated their houses, she called out, ''Len! Want to walk to school together?'' It would be easier for her to get to know him, and become closer to him, then. Len hesitated briefly, then he nodded. She waited by the roadside as he walked over to her.

The Len beside her was still scowling. She would have asked him what was wrong, were it not for the fact that the physical Len was standing here, right next to her. But if she guessed right...the only problem that Len had was that he was jealous. Especially given his words last night. He was jealous of the actual Len - which was rather strange.

After all, weren't this Len and the physical Len both part of the same person? So Miku had completely no idea why he was being so worked up about the whole thing. Maybe it was because, despite the fact that they were part of the same person, they were now separate and considered as two different entities?

She was jerked out of her reverie by the sound of Len speaking to her - the real, physical Len. ''Do you mind if I walk with you to school again, next time?'' he was asking her, his voice soft and hesitant. ''I mean, I...I'd like to have the company,'' he mumbled, almost embarrassed. She smiled at him, relieved that he had asked - she had been wondering whether she ought to ask him that question as well.

''Sure, I don't mind,'' she beamed at him, and he blinked at her. Slowly, he smiled - he had a very nice smile, and it made him look even more handsome than he already was. She felt her breath catch as he reminded her of Len...oh, wait. He _was _Len, after all. How could she forget that? They were the same people...they even looked exactly the same!

It was just that, their personalities were so different...the shattered part of Len Kagamine's soul, despite being invisible and incorporeal to everyone other than her, was lively and...alive. He wasn't cool and distant - emotionless, almost. It was as though the physical Len was dead, despite being here. Despite being corporeal.

They really did have completely different personalities, even though they were two parts of the same person...it was so strange. ''Hey, Len, do you have any siblings or anything?'' she chirped, trying to start a conversation with him. Both Lens turned around to stare at her, blinking, and the soul Len looked away, sulking, when he realised she wasn't referring to him.

Miku resisted the urge to smile. It was childish of him, but at the same time it was strangely adorable. Len blinked at her. ''Siblings...?'' he asked, in a halting manner - she was beginning to wonder whether he always spoke like that, so cautiously, so hesitantly. ''No, I don't. I'm the only child. How about you?''

She bit her lip, glancing down at the ground as they walked together, on the way to school. ''I was an only child as well,'' she said quietly. ''But now, I'm nothing more than an orphan.''

There was silence for a while, then finally Len murmured, ''I'm sorry to hear that.'' She heard faint traces of emotion in his voice, for once, and startled she looked up at him. His cerulean eyes were narrowed as he looked away from her. ''How did your parents...die?''

''An accident,'' she said simply, choosing not to elaborate further. He shot her a look, and there was a faint glimmer of curiosity in his eyes, but he didn't probe any further than that...and she was thankful for it. Even if he was Len, she wasn't ready to share details about the accident with him quite yet. Even the Len she had known since young didn't know the details.

She wondered whether she would ever dare to trust anyone with the details of the accident. Whether she would ever tell anyone how her parents had died, before her very eyes. And she wondered if she even wanted to tell anyone about it, in the first place.

Len sneaked a look at the teal haired girl beside him. She seemed lost in thought, and swallowing he glanced away. She was an orphan, who had lost her parents in an _accident, _or so she claimed. The sense of foreboding filling him increased.

Teal hair, emerald eyes, an orphan. She was the right age - eighteen, wasn't she? Just like he was? Twelve years since the fire had broken out...it seemed about right. The thought made him feel a little nervous about her identity. Miku Hatsune...she was just so familiar to him.

Could she possibly be the little girl whose parents' deaths he had caused, all those years ago? He couldn't be sure...and could it really be that coincidental? If it really was her, then he didn't know what he ought to do. Should he tell her about who he was? Should he apologise to her, or should he leave her well alone?

He flinched as, once again, he thought he felt hostile eyes boring into his back. Glancing around, he saw that there was nothing there, and exhaling he slowly turned around to face the front. He was being paranoid - although, he really was quite sure that he hadn't been imagining that glare he had been feeling, directed at him. But there was no one there...

''I'll see you during break later?'' With a start, Len realised that he and Miku had reached the school. The walk had been a fairly short one, and he hadn't noticed how time passed by so quickly. He blinked at her, startled.

Slowly, he nodded, and she smiled at him. ''See you later, then,'' she said brightly. ''I hope we're in the same class, Len!'' with that, she turned away from him, setting off for what he assumed must be her first class.

Unconsciously, he smiled too. He didn't understand why Miku was willing to talk to him and befriend him, especially since no one had ever made an effort to in the past. But whatever her reason was, he was grateful that he had a friend...he was grateful that she didn't forget his name and presence, like everyone else.

He thought he felt his heart flutter in his chest, though he didn't know the reason for that either. He just wanted to see Miku again.

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_**Solitaryloner: **Sorry if this chapter seems a little boring. I know I find it boring. This is mainly due to severe writer's block on this story. I had no idea what was going on as I wrote this chapter out. I suck._

_Can anyone please tell me the English translation of the song 8 Sec by Miku Hatsune? It's one of my favourite Miku songs, and I can't find the English translation anywhere. I'll be really grateful and will straight away write a little one-shot of any pairing for the first person to give me the translation. Thanks!_


	10. Chapter 10

Miku sat in class, eyeing the empty seat next to her own. The Len which could be seen only by her fidgeted in that seat, looking restless. That seat had been empty since the moment she had first stepped inside this classroom - she was used to having no one sitting beside her.

Ever since she had first entered school, the seats around her were always empty. Perhaps it was the blank look on her face, the way she always seemed to stare off into empty space. Or perhaps it was the way she could see things that no one else could see, the bloodstains that sometimes mysteriously appeared on her skin, even when there were no visible wounds. She was just strange in that way.

She had long grown used to being ostracised and left alone. No one dared to face the odd girl, nor did she really wish to talk to any of her classmates. She was too caught up in her missing past to think about behaving normally. There wasn't any point for her to act like she was normal, when she wasn't. Normal people were able to remember their pasts. Normal people didn't see ghostly blond boys.

Len glanced at her, from where he was sitting - she saw him turn to look at her, out of the corner of her eyes. She didn't return his glance, though. Len had been acting strangely, ever since they had run into the physical half of him this morning. The Len only she could see had been...upset, almost, though she still didn't quite understand why. He seemed to be almost jealous. But that was ridiculous.

How could Len possibly be jealous of himself? That was just silly, though she supposed it could be possible. After all, they had different personalities - despite being the same person, they were...different. They were two separate people, two parts of a whole. Maybe, if she were the one in Len's place, she would be feeling the same way as he did, right then. Who knew? She couldn't make any comment.

But jealousy was the only reason she could think of, as to why Len was so sulky today. She was grateful that he had accompanied her to school today - she liked his presence, and even though she was known for being a strange loner, she preferred the company of other people, rather than of herself. But Len's bad mood today was starting to make her wonder if maybe him staying home would have been a better choice. His sulkiness was distracting.

Putting her head down on her arms, she watched the clock on the classroom wall tick, counting down the seconds until lesson started. She didn't want to have to wait any longer. The first lesson was Geography, and their teacher was notorious for always being late. Especially for the first class of the day. It was annoying, especially when there wasn't anything else for her to do in class, except for sit and listen.

No one wanted to talk to her, after all...unlike her classmates, she didn't talk or ignore the teacher in class, simply because she had nothing else to listen to other than to the lesson itself. Which was why she didn't like Geography, because the teacher was always late. And the teacher being late meant that there was nothing to distract herself with. Miku became bored rather easily, especially in school.

Her eyes drifted to the clock once again. The teacher wouldn't be here for another ten minutes, at least...there was a tug on her shirt sleeve, and startled she jerked up. Her head swivelled to the side, her eyes wide as she stared at Len. Len, who had obviously been the one to pull on her sleeve, gestured to the door of the classroom. When she blinked at him, uncomprehending, he sighed softly.

''Leave the classroom,'' he said, talking at a slightly louder volume than he usually did, so that she could hear him over the loud chatter of the class. ''I want to talk to you. And I want you to be able to talk to me, too,'' he added at the questioning look on her face. She bit her lip, wondering whether she should - what if the teacher arrived earlier than expected? At the pleading look in his eyes, though, she relented, rising from her seat after him.

As she made her way out of the class, following after the ghostly boy, curious glances were cast at her - but no one tried to stop her. Everyone was too busy talking to their own little groups of friends, and anyway no one ever wanted to interfere in her business. Nobody ever dared to approach her, to talk to her unless it was absolutely necessary. Or out of simple curiosity, about where her blood stains came from.

This time was no exception, and she walked out of class without being bothered by anyone. A feat only she could achieve, because anyone else who had tried would have been stopped and questioned by the Head of the Discipline Committee, who happened to be in her class. But the Head was reluctant to talk to her, too - which was why she could do many things in school without getting caught. Like cutting class. The teachers didn't mind, either.

After all, just like the rest of the students, they were all nervous of being in her presence. There was just something about Miku's blank stare that made everyone wary of her...everyone except for Len. Len wasn't frightened of her. Both spirit Len and physical Len didn't seem to have any fear or wariness of her, and she was thankful for that. Despite what everyone thought...she didn't like being alone. Always being alone made her feel lonely.

There wasn't anyone out in the hallways of the school. Casting another look around to make sure that she and Len were really the only people left outside the classrooms, she took a deep breath and spun around to face Len, her gaze fixed onto the floor. ''Okay, so what exactly did you want to talk to me about -'' She exhaled sharply, shocked, as she suddenly felt herself being slammed back against the wall.

Her back was pressed to the cool wall, and she was trapped between Len's arms. His eyes were wild, his expression wary - he looked like he was expecting something to happen. Something...that no one else had any idea about. Her breath caught as she saw his cerulean gaze studying her, his eyes drifting from her own eyes, to her nose, to her lips. Her lips parted slightly as he stared at them.

Then quickly, he leant in, his lips pressing against hers possessively. He tasted like cinnamon, spicy and heady, and she felt her eyes close as he claimed her mouth, suddenly feeling giddy as his tongue swept past her lips, running out against her bottom teeth. His hands moved up from her shoulders, sliding up the curve of her neck to cup her face, pulling her even closer against his body.

She kissed him back, but only for a little while. Before the kiss could go on for too long, she pulled away from him, her eyes searching his curiously. His own blue eyes, the colour of a cloudless summer sky, gazed back at her, a faint plea in them. She wondered at that. ''So you told me to leave the classroom just so that you could kiss me?'' She ought to be annoyed by that, but...she found it rather amusing.

His perfect, full lips pressed together, forming a childish pout. He shot her a puppy dog look, the plea in his eyes intensifying. ''I...I just wanted to make sure that you still knew I existed,'' he muttered, ducking his head. His pale cheeks turned faintly pink as he spoke. ''You kept talking to the other Len, on the way here...and you kept ignoring me earlier...I wondered whether, you know, you didn't like me anymore. I was worried that you would forget me.''

''How could I forget you?'' she asked, genuinely bewildered. She wasn't really sure how to answer the heartfelt question. ''I mean, you're right there. Sitting next to me. Just because I didn't talk to you doesn't mean that you no longer have a place in my heart,'' she laughed softly, reaching up to pat his cheek. He leant his cheek into her palm. ''The other Len can't replace you...I don't know him as long as I know you. Don't worry unnecessarily, okay?''

''I know that I'm being dumb,'' he sighed, looking away from her. ''It's just that he's physical. While I'm not. And since we're technically two halves of the same person...we're the same, yet we're different. I'd understand if you'd prefer him over me. Since you don't have to pretend that you can't see him. He's physical. Other people can see him too. You can talk to him, and people won't think that you're weird...not like how it is for me.''

''Shh,'' she placed a finger against his lips, smiling up at him. ''It's cute, how you get so worried,'' she teased him, and his eyes snapped back to her, expression startled looking. ''You should know one thing about me, Len - I don't change my mind easily. Okay? So don't worry about me suddenly deciding to forget you and go for the physical you. I don't know him, but I know you.'' She leant up, kissing him on the cheek. ''You trust me about this, don't you?''

The last part came out as a soft whisper. Len blinked at her, looking conflicted, before finally he nodded, his lips slowly curving into a smile. Hesitantly, he tilted her face up, his lips brushing against hers once again - a soft and gentle kiss. It could barely even be considered a kiss...it was nothing more than a brief brush of their lips. ''I don't want my place to be taken by anyone. Don't leave me,'' he said softly, sounding haunted. ''Promise me that. Please?''

''I won't leave you,'' she promised him, knowing that she would never break that promise. Why would she? She had feelings for him too...so there was no way she would ever tire of him. He was being paranoid - but then, she had to admit that she found that paranoia strangely adorable. And rather sweet. ''No matter what happens, I'll be here with you. We're bound together, after all. Aren't we? You did say before that you were a part of me, as well...''

''I am,'' he agreed, cocking his head. ''I'm a part of both you and Len. How strange,'' he laughed quietly. ''I'm a part of two people. But it's okay...to fall in love with one of the two, right?'' his blue eyes regarded her quizzically, his hand reaching up to absently run through his blond hair. She didn't know how to answer that question, so she simply nodded, choosing not to say anything in response.

The nod satisfied him, and the smile returned to his face, that warm, loving smile which she was starting to find extremely familiar. She smiled back, though a feeling of unease began to make its way up to her heart. She was beginning to have some questions about their relationship, questions that he himself had just asked her. Questions that she never would have thought of, otherwise. If he hadn't voiced them out.

Was it okay for him to love her, if he was a part of her? She didn't know about that - she assumed that there shouldn't be any problem with that. But the other question...if, on the chance that she ever developed feelings for the physical Len, then what should she do? She would be torn between two boys then. Two boys who were part of the same person. If that happened, then who should she choose? How would she decide between them?

She pushed the question aside, letting her arms wrap tightly around Len's waist as he hugged her close to him, relief in his eyes. No, there was no need to worry about having to choose between the two of them. Like she had told him just now, she wasn't going to fall for the physical Len just because he was corporeal. The Len she loved was the Len she knew - she didn't know the physical Len at all. Not one bit.

But then, if she didn't know him at all, why did she feel like he was familiar to her...like he was somehow connected to her? Linked to her in a way even the spirit Len wasn't?


	11. Chapter 11

_**Solitaryloner: **I've started using my FictionPress account! I have one story there currently, please check it out! My FictionPress account is called solitaryloner as well._

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_Who am I? _Len Kagamine, whispered his mind in response. He frowned, knowing that the question and answer were both stupid - but that answer had not been the one he had been looking for. Nor had that question been one which could be so easily answered, not by anyone. Not even by himself. He was a nobody, after all. No one even knew that he existed.

No one could see who he was, not really. No one could even see him, to begin with. He was a faceless ghost, a fragmented shard of the past. He was someone with no name, nor any physical body. And most of all, he hurt. He hurt everywhere, all over the place - he couldn't even breathe without hurting somewhere. And he was sick of that pain, sick of all that blood no one else could see. He kept bleeding...

How much could he bleed before he ran dry? There was so much he didn't understand. He understood nothing, even about his own...body. Especially about himself. He was a human, wasn't he? Yet at the same time he wasn't. He was less than that, nothing more than a mere shadow of what could possibly have been. If only there was a way to be a human. Properly. If only there was a way he could be seen...

''If there was a way to remain forever alive, even if it meant giving your physical body up, would you grasp that chance to stay in the world of the living for evermore?'' This was a question he had spent much time pondering about, and it was a question that he had absolutely no answer to. A chance at immortality, but without a physical vessel to contain his eternal soul...was there a point?

No, there wasn't any point to that, and he knew it. But humans were all greedy for life, for everlastingness. He couldn't help feeling greedy as well - even though he was nothing but a shattered fragment of soul, human greed lingered on in his heart, in his mind. He wouldn't mind being immortal, and he had already given up his body anyway. Not intentionally, perhaps, but he still had.

Since there was only one person on the whole mortal plane who could see him, then was there any point to existing forever? _Why, yes, of course - the one mortal who is able to see you is Miku Hatsune. The girl you've been watching for so long. If you were forced to pick between her and your body, then which would you choose? _It was a difficult decision. He didn't want to remain bodiless, but Miku...

No, he didn't want to give her up either. Len's thoughts were fragmented, just like he himself was - quick thoughts flickering through his mind, in and out, barely registering and making absolutely no sense, even to himself. His thoughts were all separate and disjointed, thoughts which were completely unrelated to each other - he jumped from thought to thought, thinking of completely random, errant issues which had zero links with each other.

He was used to thinking in this way. No one else could comprehend the cluttered mess that made up his thoughts, no one save for him. And sometimes, even he himself was unable to decipher the confused thoughts that he was so prone to thinking of. This cluttered indecision made it even harder for him to relate to other people and what they wanted. He didn't understand other people's way of thinking.

''I'm confused. I'm confusing myself,'' he whispered aloud, looking down at the palms of his hands. They were stained with dark red, as usual - he wondered if there was a way to get rid of the blood. It wasn't like he could just take a shower. At least, he thought that was the case. To be honest, he had never actually attempted to take a bath before - it wasn't like he really ever became dirty or filthy.

The blood was an inherent part of him, and he couldn't get rid of it. Frowning, he held out a finger, swiping it down his skin - the blood collected on his fingertip, but more blood just flowed out from nowhere to take its place. It was so strange, and he didn't understand it. Because of that, he didn't like it - no one ever liked the things that they couldn't understand. Len himself was no exception to that.

Confusion. That was all he was made up of, and he was used to un-sureness being a constant factor in his life. In fact, he thought that if he ever lost that indecisiveness which made up such a huge part of his psyche, he wouldn't be 'him' anymore. He would be someone else. This muddled confusion had been a constant part of him, ever since he had been ripped free of the body he had once been a part of.

But that confusion had helped him to see things in a different light. Humans, those with bodies, were all so rushed that they never slowed down to observe what could possibly be new around them. They didn't see the pretty little colours, the colours that were all within them. What were the colours called? Souls, weren't they? Len could see souls, even though he himself was one. A spirit. A soul, free of its body.

Different people had differently coloured souls. It was a bright splash of colour, hidden deep within themselves, and everyone had one soul...except for the physical half of him, that vessel which he had long sought. That particular body had no colour because its soul was missing. He was missing, and because of that the body had no soul. Without a soul, there was no spark. No life. Few feelings and emotions.

Miku had a soul. He had seen that soul ever since young, ever since he had been...six? Did souls age? She had been six when he had first met her...when he had first been torn into existence. He had first met her then, and he could honestly say that he had never seen another soul as strong willed as Miku's was. Her soul was steely, a beautifully bright shade of shimmering, metallic gold.

It was strange to think of souls having colours, when he himself had no special colour. Not like the rest of the souls which had been trapped inside their human vessels. Len knew that if it were not for the blood, and for the fact that no one other than Miku was able to see him, he would have been able to pass for a perfectly normal human. That other souls had no human shape, but were rather splashes of colour...

Well, it was rather odd to him. Why was he so special? Just because he had been torn apart from the rest of 'him'? Did being separated from the body that hosted him give him a human figure of his own? He had no answers to any of his own questions, but he didn't mind - it wasn't like the questions served any purpose other than to satisfy his own idle curiosity, anyway. The answers weren't extremely important.

He wasn't very sure what all the different colours indicated. But he knew that gold was a good colour. He rarely ever saw pure gold, the same pure gold that Miku's colour was. But it was...a good colour to have. He could sense that, somehow. Gold was a good colour. Black was not. Black indicated an absence of kindness and compassion. A lack of warmth and the ability to pity. Black was for the criminals, for the evildoers, for those against moral rights.

''Miku?'' he asked, raising his voice from the soft whisper it had originally been. Her name on his tongue caught her attention, and she turned to glance at him. School was now over, and Len was wondering where the physical side of him was, and what he was doing. He got a vague sense that Miku was wondering the exact same thing - neither of them had seen the physical Len today, around the school. Not even once.

''Yes?'' she whispered, her eyes darting all over the place - making sure that no one was looking at her talking to herself. ''You've been acting strangely today...'' Slowly, she reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone, then pressed the phone to her ear - Len smiled. That was a smart move. Pretending to talk to someone over the phone, so that no one would think that she was having a conversation with herself.

''I don't think that I was acting very strangely,'' he laughed softly, staring down at the ground. The grass was green - green was a soothing colour. Green souls belonged to calm and peaceful people. Like Miku's adoptive mother, Luka Megurine. Her soul was green, and Len felt very comfortable around her...even though she couldn't see him. The pink haired woman exuded an reassuring air of peace.

''You were,'' Miku insisted, and he saw her fingers tighten around her phone. He knew that she was getting agitated - he knew how to tell what kind of emotion she was feeling, just by observing the little nuances and reactions she made in response to whatever he said to her. He had watched her for long enough to sense her feelings and her thoughts. He knew Miku Hatsune as well as he knew himself. The only thing he didn't know about her...

Well, the only thing he didn't know about her was how her parents had died. He also didn't know what her life had been like, before the age of six - but then, she didn't know either. She herself had no idea of her past, so there wasn't any embarrassment in not knowing. He had watched her for so long that her every habit and quirk was imprinted in his mind. And he loved her precisely because of all her little habits.

''I was jealous,'' he answered, looking away. He could feel his cheeks warming. How strange, that even a lost, dislocated soul like him could blush. Was it normal, he wondered, or was it simply because Miku made him more...alive? ''I didn't want to lose you, not when I have nothing left but you. You...you know that, don't you?'' his voice dropped to a whisper. ''I couldn't bear the thought of losing you to another person.''

''Len, you were getting jealous of yourself,'' she laughed quietly, still walking. They were on the way home. Len didn't notice that he had slowed to a stop as he spoke, and he hurried to catch up with the petite tealette, who was still striding off before him. ''It was so adorable, actually,'' she continued, causing his cheeks to warm further. ''But there really wasn't any need for you to worry about such a thing. All right?''

''I know,'' he muttered sullenly. ''You've told me that before. Quite a number of times, actually,'' he continued, tucking his hands into the pockets of his pants. Len was always in the same outfit - there was no need for him to change out of it, after all. He was always dressed in the same white shirt and white pants. Strangely, the clothes had grown along with him. He had never once removed this set of clothes before.

''Yes, so I don't see why you have to worry to such an extent,'' she sighed, before smiling, turning around to face him. Her eyes met his as her lips continued curving into a sweet smile. That smile took his breath away - as it always did. Honestly, he couldn't recall a single time when he hadn't been awestruck by her smile. It was a sight people rarely ever saw, her real smile, and he knew seeing it was a privilege.

He could recall telling her before that it would be a lie to say that he had no feelings whatsoever for her. He had watched her for so long, ever since they had both been mere children. It would be impossibly difficult not to develop some kind of feelings towards her - she was the only person who could see him. But more than that...her presence comforted him. Made him feel like he wasn't totally invisible.

Though only a fool would get involved with a person he could never have, a person he would never be able to keep. Len wasn't an idiot - he knew that he could not possibly be with her, not the way he craved. He was nothing more than a mere spirit, and she couldn't love a spirit. He couldn't be so selfish as to demand that she stay with someone no one else was able to see or talk to. But the thought of giving her up...

''I worry because I don't want to lose you, even though I know that with each passing day the chances of you slipping away from me gets greater and greater,'' he finally answered, speaking what they both knew to be the truth. Her emerald eyes flashed with some kind of unidentifiable emotion before she looked away from him, not daring to meet his probing gaze. They both knew that he spoke the truth.

No matter how much they would like to deny this simple fact, they both knew that a physical human could never love an invisible fragment of shattered soul. How could someone ever love a person who wasn't even corporeal, after all? She promised that she would never love another person, that she would stay with him - but realistically speaking, could their kind of relationship ever work out? He didn't know.

Hearing her promise that she would never love anyone other than him, hearing her tell him that she wasn't so fickle minded...well, he had liked it. He couldn't deny that. But even through the flutter of pleasure he had felt from hearing her words, cold realism had taken root in his heart - he knew that despite her promise, she would have to leave. Perhaps she might not want to leave him, but circumstances would demand for otherwise. Their situation couldn't change.

He knew he couldn't be so selfish as to expect her to stay with him forever. But even if one knew what was the right thing to do...it was hard to actually do it. Especially when it came to accepting the loss of someone precious to him. Hadn't he already lost enough, before?


	12. Chapter 12

''Miku...'' Len whispered, watching her from his window. He saw the teal haired girl walking down the road, walking in the direction of her own house. The house that was opposite his.

As he watched her, he thought he could feel something aching, in his chest. It was a strange feeling, a foreign feeling that he was unused to. He didn't know whether or not he ought to be worried, that he felt such a thing - the ache was a bitter-sweet one. It was a bitter pleasure, watching the tealette walking into her home - not that he understood why he would feel that way about her. This was all very strange.

He had left school early today, mainly because he hadn't wanted to be treated like he was invisible. No one had missed him, but he wasn't surprised by that - he doubted that even the teachers had noticed his disappearance. He sighed, turning away from the window, his mind spinning with thoughts...did Miku realise that he hadn't been in school, the whole day? He found himself hoping that she had noticed.

Why? It wasn't just because of the possibility that she was the little girl he had spent his whole life searching for - something about her was just so familiar to him. Whenever he looked at her, or even thought of her name, an unfamiliar longing would flicker through him...and he wasn't sure whether he minded that longing or not. It made no sense why he would yearn for a girl whom he barely even knew...

He glanced up at the window once again. This time, he saw his reflection - chin length blond hair, brushing gently against his shoulders. Dark blue eyes, haunted and lonely - the eyes of someone searching for something unknown. Searching for someone he would never be able to find. He glanced behind his familiar reflection, knowing what he would see in the glass. It was another him. A different him.

It was a him that he didn't recognise...a happier him, a more vibrant him - a him whose eyes flickered with darkness. A bloodstained him who he found familiar, but not at the same time. This separate reflection appeared at some times, and disappeared at others. He had seen this other, unknown self several times before, ever since the age of six, and up till now he still had no idea what it indicated for him.

If he had spent his whole life looking for something he had lost...why had he lost his vibrancy? He had lost everything which made him memorable to others, but he wasn't sure exactly what it was that he had lost. He knew that whatever it was, it was gone...but he didn't know what he was supposed to call it. This thing that he had lost. It was supposed to be important - it made him seem alive.

He ran his fingers against the cool glass of the window - and he found himself hoping that he would be able to catch another glimpse of Miku. He shook himself, feeling a little irritated by his illogical yearning - she was a girl he had met only yesterday afternoon. Why was it that she affected him so? He couldn't explain to himself why he had this longing for another person...a girl who probably didn't even remember him.

He hoped that she could still recall who he was, and not forget him the way everyone else did. To be honest, he had found it a great surprise that she could recall his name, this morning - then again, she had said that he reminded her of someone else she had once known. Perhaps that was the only reason why she was capable of remembering what was his name...because he couldn't think of any other reason why.

He retreated from the window, casting Miku's house one last glance. That glance made up his mind - he wanted to talk to her, this girl who had captured his attention and wouldn't let go of it. Besides, he didn't have anything else to do at home...would Miku mind if he went over to visit her? He bit on his lip, unsure of what he ought to do...what would be considered polite and reasonable, and what was not.

_I just want - no, need - to talk to her. Maybe one little visit wouldn't be too bad. It's not like she hates me or anything of that sort. Does she? I don't understand why she holds such a strong pull over me...all I know is, I can't stop thinking of her. And I really want to talk to her, about anything and everything. So long as I can hear her sweet voice saying my name._

With that, he made up his mind, slowly walking out of the room. He had never done anything like this before - he had never visited someone of his own accord. Tried to speak to someone, without them talking to him first. Much less when this person was someone he barely even knew...but Miku was different. From the moment he had first met her, he had already known she would be someone different.

She had known his name even before he had said it to her. She had talked to him this morning, had asked him whether he wanted to go to school with her. She had remembered who he was, when people usually completely forgot about his presence after the first five minutes or so. Miku Hatsune was special, and he...he needed to talk to her. Because she made him feel normal, like he wasn't...forgettable.

Why was she so different from the rest? He didn't understand why, and that puzzled him. He just had to know why she was not like other people...and why she was so special to him.

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Miku heard the sounds of someone ringing the doorbell. She smiled apologetically at Len, who was scowling at the floor, clearly displeased that someone had dared to interrupt him while he was talking to her. ''I'll just go see who it is, then I'll be right back,'' she hastily assured him, noticing the way his vivid cerulean blue eyes lightened as she spoke those words.

''Be fast,'' came the soft whisper. She nodded, letting her fingers brush against his cheek. Reluctantly, he released her other hand, the one he had been holding on to all this while. Miku turned around and left her room, where she had been sitting on her bed with Len, the two of them just talking and laughing away. Luka and Gakupo were both out at work, so she had the whole house to herself, as she usually did.

She walked down the stairs, wondering who could her visitor possibly be. A schoolmate, perhaps? But she doubted that - everyone was so frightened of her that few people ever came to visit her. Whenever her classmates came over to her home, it was usually so that they could borrow notes or things like that - no one ever paid Miku Hatsune a social visit. Miku was a loner, too strange and quiet to talk to.

Musing quietly to herself, she went over to the front door, hoping that whatever it was wouldn't take too long - she still wanted to get back to Len. Twisting the door knob, the door swung open...and she blinked. ''Len?'' she asked, her voice shaky. It took her a while to realise that this was the corporeal Len, the one everyone was able to see, not the bloodstained Len who was visible to only herself.

Len was standing on her doorstep, his dark blue gaze darting to everywhere but her. ''I...I just wanted to talk to you for a while,'' came his usual halting voice. He always did speak so carefully, so hesitantly, as though he feared making any errors or slips while he talked. ''Just for a while?'' he added, this time sounding a little hopeful. It was one of the first few times she had ever heard him speak with emotion.

In fact, he was usually quite..._dead, _his voice as flat and unemotional as a cadaver. As lifeless as a reflection in the mirror. It was as though he was the one who did not truly live, not the Len whom she had known since young. She wondered why was that so - was it because he was no more than an empty vessel, with no soul to give him life and energy? ''Oh. Sure, why not?'' she smiled at him, letting him inside.

Len hesitated for a bit longer, seemingly unwilling to walk past the front door. Finally, with a barely audible sigh of what appeared to be relief, the blond boy entered her home, his blue eyes taking in everything. She closed the door behind him, and Len jumped a little at the 'click' sound that made. Miku hid another smile - he seemed so uncertain of everything which was happening. Much like a child, actually.

''You have a...nice home,'' he said slowly, turning around to glance shyly at her. She shrugged a little, looking around to see what he could see. It was like any other home, she supposed - they were standing in her living room, which had several armchairs and couches in it. The television was switched on, not that anyone was watching it. A steaming cup of coffee stood on the table, untouched.

''Thank you,'' she began to say, but then her voice died in her throat as she saw the other Len appear before her, his light cerulean eyes narrowed. He folded his arms across his chest, staring intently at her, before his gaze slid across to the other Len. Instantly, his blue eyes became hooded, and Miku knew that he wasn't happy. _I don't want to share, _she could read the expression on his face, at that very moment.

Corporeal Len was completely oblivious to the presence of a third, extremely unhappy person in the room. ''Nicer than mine. It's...warmer?'' his sentence sounded almost like a question, rather than a statement. She wondered what he meant by that - warmer in what sense? Did he mean it literally? Their air-conditioner seemed to be working perfectly fine...so in the figurative sense, perhaps. But why did he say that?

The real Len was standing next to the spirit Len, and she was struck by just how...similar the two of them appeared to be. Both had bright blond hair, twisted up into a ponytail. Both had blue eyes, but the real Len had dark blue eyes, while the spirit one had light cerulean ones. And of course, there was the matter of all the blood which covered the not corporeal one...but otherwise, they were exactly the same.

They were one and the same person, and that was something she still had yet to get used to. The fact that the person she loved...was not one, but rather half of someone. Did that mean that her own love was a half-hearted one, if she only loved half of someone? Miku glanced away from the sight of the two of them - it was like staring at a pair of twins. Two halves of the same person, one unaware of the other.

Suddenly, the other Len, the Len whom she didn't know very well, lurched back from the cabinet he had been staring at. Miku started, jerked out of her reverie - she watched the boy, his eyes widening in...shock? But what was it that he had seen that made him react that way? He looked...almost frightened. There wasn't anything scary in the cabinet, though - nothing but several framed, old photographs.

The photographs belonged to her, evidently. Not that she could recall what had happened while all those photographs had been taken. They were evidence of a past life, a life that she had no memory of - the only thing she could recall from those pictures were her parents. Luka and Gakupo had retrieved the photographs and placed them in their home, hoping that the constant sight of them would help Miku.

So far, Miku still couldn't remember anything from...before. Before the accident, before her parents' deaths, before she had first met the spirit Len, the spirit whom she had thought a hallucination. The cabinet showcased nothing but a bundle of old, forgotten memories - so why was it that Len seemed to recoil from the cabinet, as though something inside frightened him? Made him want to run away from here?

Len was reeling. _Two smiling, teal haired adults, each one with one hand placed on their grinning daughter. At the beach, perhaps? There was a sandcastle behind them, maybe one the girl herself had constructed. The teal haired woman leant down to her daughter - ''I love you,'' she whispers. ''Don't ever get into danger, Miku. No matter what, we won't ever let you get hurt, my precious little girl.''_

They were all so familiar...he shook his head, trying his best to get rid of the lingering memories which had appeared out of nowhere. He didn't recognise those memories - they didn't belong to him. Yet, at the same time, he felt as though he knew them from...somewhere. It was all so strange. But definitely, he recognised the little girl he had seen, and the two teal haired adults who had been in the memory.

The couple who had rescued him from the burning fire, back when he was a six-year-old. And the little girl, their daughter...the daughter who was gazing inquisitively at him, wondering what was happening. He knew now, after catching sight of those photos in the cabinet - he knew exactly who she was, and how she was related to him. Why he found her so familiar, even though he had never seen her before.

She was the girl whose parents' deaths he had caused. After years and years of looking, he had actually managed to find her...and she was still alive. She had managed to survive the fire...he wondered how she had done that. What had happened to her after he had turned and ran away? Did she recognise him from that incident, did she even remember that there had been someone else present at that death scene?

He lifted his gaze to the cabinet once more - and this time, he froze, unable to move. That secondary reflection had returned once again, watching him with piercing blue eyes which seemed to condemn him. _You're wrong. Wrong. Wrong. _That's what the reflection seemed to say, and Len couldn't block it out. _Wrong._


	13. Chapter 13

_**Solitaryloner: **__Okay, I'll be frank with you guys. I was actually intending to drop this._

_I mean, you know how I got the idea for this story? I just had this scene in my head, with Miku looking in the mirror, and instead of her reflection, a bloodstained Len is looking back at her. And with that scene, I started this story._

_There was no planning whatsoever. I don't even know what I'm doing with this story, or with my life, or if anyone is actually bothering to read this right now. But suddenly, a whole bunch of people are asking me to update this story, and I was like wow, people actually like this even though it's completely nonsensical._

_So yeah. Because of that, I decided not to drop this story. And I'll actually work on a good plot for this, since so far I'm just taking this one step at a time, and I think that I can do better. Personally, I feel this has a lot of potential, so I want to play around a little, and see how far I can take it...anyway. On to the story._

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Len was sitting on Miku's couch, staring off into empty space. He still couldn't believe it.

_How is she going to react if she realises that I'm the one who got her parents killed? _All along, his whole life, he had been searching for this girl. The person he knew he owed a debt to. But now that he was facing her, now that he had finally found the girl he long sought...

It was harder to broach the topic than he had thought it would be. Miku was in the kitchen, pouring him a glass of water. He had said that it wouldn't be necessary, but she insisted, telling him to take a seat on the couch. He glanced at the kitchen - Miku had been gone for quite a while, and he was wondering if there was anything wrong. To fill a glass with water...

Surely it wouldn't need ten minutes. Feeling a little worried by now, Len got off the couch, walking into the kitchen, wondering whether Miku was okay or...if she was having trouble. Whatever those troubles happened to be.

What he didn't expect to see, when he walked into the kitchen, was Miku having a hushed conversation with...well, herself. She appeared to be arguing with thin air, a look of irritation on her pretty face. Len just stared at her - she hadn't appeared to notice him yet. He wondered if he should try to catch her attention, or if he should just leave her to finish her...argument.

Then, abruptly, Miku quietened, her green eyes widening. Her lips were parted, her hands slowly reaching up to wrap around...well, Len still couldn't see anyone there. He was starting to wonder if the tealette was rehearsing for a role in a play or something. It seemed almost as if there was someone next to the girl. But Len couldn't see anyone in the kitchen, other than Miku herself. It was rather...strange.

Then he blinked. He swore he saw something shimmer, out of the corner of his eye - there it was again. Next to Miku...as he watched the girl's eyes closing, he saw a figure shimmer into existence, next to her. A figure with blond hair, twisted into a ponytail, pale skin, a face as familiar to Len as his own...his eyes widened.

It was himself. The person next to Miku was _him. _The only difference was, the other him was covered in blood. The other him, the other Len...he was kissing Miku, his hands cupping her face, his body pressed against hers. Their eyes were closed as they kissed, clinging on to each other tightly. The same way a drowning man would clutch at straws, trying to prevent himself from sinking. Len shook his head.

He couldn't believe what he was seeing. That there was another Len here, someone who looked just like him, yet was not him...''What's going on?'' he asked softly. The moment he spoke, their eyes flicked open, and Miku sprang away from the other Len, panic written all over her face. The other him kept his arm wrapped around Miku's shoulders, his eyes narrowing.

''Oh, Len,'' Miku smiled tremulously. ''Hello. Um, I was just practising a, um, a kissing scene for the Drama Club. They're putting on a play, and I...I really want to get the role of the main character. So...um, yeah. I was practising for that,'' she said weakly, fiddling with her long teal hair. The other Len tilted his head, staring intently at him. There was another difference, Len noted - the other him had cerulean eyes.

Len's eyes were dark blue, not cerulean blue. His eyes never left the other Len, not for a single instant. ''Miku. You're a terrible liar,'' he said softly. ''Who...who's that?'' he tilted his head, in the direction of the other Len. Miku let out a gasp, staring in the direction which he had indicated. The other Len looked a little shocked, that he could see him. Len wondered why.

''You...you can see Len?'' Miku asked. Then she shook her head. ''I mean, you can see...'' her voice trailed off as she gestured helplessly. ''But no one else can see him. No one other than me,'' she murmured. ''How can you see him?''

''Who is he?'' Len asked, this time in a louder tone of voice. Miku flinched. ''He looks like me, but...'' his voice faded away. The other Len met his gaze, his lips parting - Miku turned to stare at him, shushing him, but strangely enough Len was unable to hear anything. He couldn't hear a single word, even though it seemed that the...other him was speaking. Trying to talk.

''I can't hear him,'' he said bluntly. The other him drew back, surprise flitting across his face - Len supposed he could understand why. If he could see him, if Miku could hear him, then why couldn't Len himself hear what he was saying? Len didn't have an answer to that question. All he knew was, he had no idea what was going on, and he wanted to get some answers.

''Len...'' Miku seemed to be at a loss for words. ''The situation here is complicated, and I -'' she stepped forward, away from the other him. The moment she did that, the other Len...faded away, as though there hadn't been anyone there to begin with. Len reeled back, his blue eyes widening in disbelief. Miku paused, noticing the way the blond boy withdrew from her.

''He...he's gone?'' the physical Len said weakly. Miku darted a look back - no, the incorporeal Len was still standing there, confusion evident on his face. He hadn't disappeared, hadn't gone off to some place else, so why couldn't Len see him? No...actually, the real question was, how could Len suddenly see the...ghostly him? When he hadn't been able to do so this morning...

''Can't he see me?'' spirit Len asked, sounding unsure. Miku just shrugged, her eyes flicking back and forth, between one Len and the other. She didn't understand what was going on - she had no idea what all this meant. What it implied. Did the fact that Len could now see his spirit half - even though that had only been for a moment or so - mean...they were close to reuniting? Or did it mean something else?

''Len...'' she said softly, approaching him warily. His dark blue eyes met hers - for once, she saw hints of emotion on his handsome face. The physical Len was usually rather...unemotional, barely showing any signs of feeling - but now, she could see the faintest traces of shock and panic in his normally dead eyes. Fear, even. ''I don't know what's happening, either. I can explain what I know to you, but it's not much.''

His gaze met hers. He looked hesitant still. As cautious as he always was...''Tell me what you know, Miku,'' he whispered. ''What the hell is going on here?'' he uncharacteristically added. Miku swallowed. She didn't know what she ought to say, how much he would be able to accept, what he would believe. She wasn't even certain how much of what she knew was fact, and how much was just simple speculation.

''Len...the Len you saw...he's a part of you,'' she started, seeing the way he tilted his head, his gaze carefully neutral. Like he was analysing every single word she said, deciding whether it was a truth or a lie. ''From what I understand, he's your soul...he's the part of you which you need to truly enjoy life. To feel like you're a part of this world. He's a part of me, too...he was looking for you, you know. For twelve years.''

''Wait,'' Len said abruptly, his blue eyes still unreadable, ''If he's bound to you...how is he a part of me?'' he regarded her intently. Miku received the feeling that he was scrutinising her. Like...like he was trying to dissect her, to see if she was telling the truth. As if he could open her up, and see what she was thinking. The way a scientist would observe a fascinating experiment - coolly. Logically. Intently.

It was rather intimidating, actually. He was so logical, so calm and unemotional, that it made her feel like she was speaking to a robot. And he had been so shocked, just moments ago...''I don't understand why, either,'' she glanced back at the incorporeal Len. That Len was staring at his physical self - he seemed to be almost...glaring. Yes, that was the word. Glaring at him, like he had done some great wrong or such.

Spirit Len noticed her looking. ''I don't like the way he's talking to you,'' he explained, catching sight of the quizzical expression on her face. ''Like he...like he doesn't care about you at all. About your feelings. The only thing he cares about is getting his answers...he thinks that you should know everything, and that it's your fault if you can't answer everything the way he wants you to. It's not right,'' Len muttered sullenly.

She smiled briefly, to show that she had heard him, and that she appreciated his concern for her. But then, immediately after that she turned back to the corporeal Len, who was still waiting for his answer. The look on his face never changed - he still looked coolly detached, like he was trying his best to remain removed from the situation at hand. A spectator, not a participant. _Nothing but a spectator. What he wants..._

Was it a protective cover, this logical facade he was showing now? A way for him to hide away from reality, so that he didn't have to face his problems so soon? ''The part about him being a part of me is just what he told me,'' she said to the real Len. ''He's missing from you, and he's a part of me. I think...without him, that's why you're like this. You...'' she paused, noticing how his eyes widened, ''You're not very lively.''

She thought he would snap at her for that little comment, although that wasn't characteristic of his behaviour. Or, at least, what she had seen of his attitude so far. He was so soft-spoken, so cautious by nature - it was difficult to imagine someone like him giving in to impulses, and being anything but...withdrawn. Even now, the way he asked her questions...it was so cautious. Quiet. He was insistently hesitant, a paradox in itself. But that...was that an insult to him?

''I know that...I'm not lively,'' he answered as quietly as ever, to her surprise. ''But I didn't expect that it would have an external cause. I wasn't like...this, when I was younger. I used to be cheerful. Outgoing. A happy child, you know? Until an accident took place...'' he turned away from her, his long blond fringe falling forward to hide his eyes. ''After that, I was never quite the same. And I didn't have any idea why.''

''You're not upset that I said you're not lively?'' for the implication was that he was...dead. That he didn't know how to enjoy life. That he was unlike other teenagers...like her, maybe? She wasn't the liveliest of all children, either. In fact, perhaps she could be considered to be as withdrawn and reclusive as Len himself was. Her only friend was someone no one could see...didn't that make her strange, as well?

''There's no point in getting upset when that's a truth,'' came the soft reply. ''I am not outgoing. I am not...outspoken. I'm the most forgettable person in the world, it seems,'' his laugh had hints of bitterness in it. ''No one ever recalls who I am. No one but you...'' he glanced back at her, dark blue eyes blank. ''_He's _the reason why you knew my name, isn't it?'' he asked her.

She nodded. What else could she say? He sighed quietly, his eyes closing. ''So, you mentioned that he was searching for me, for twelve years. Why? Because he wants to be real? Because he thinks that I can give him a body? If that was the case...why did he appear to you, and not me? The main question here is, why are the two of you even bound...how are we connected?''

She didn't know. She couldn't answer most of the questions he had asked. Save for one. ''He was looking for you, because before we found you recently...he was dying. I don't know what happens to...spirits, or whatever he is, when they die. But I know he was dying,'' her words softened, and she glanced at the other Len - he was looking away from them, his face blank. As blank as his physical self. ''He was dying...''

''So he's not dying anymore, since you found me?'' Len tilted his head again, confusion flitting across his face. ''I see. And I guess...since he's a part of me, we need to be reunited...'' he said quietly, coming to that revelation of his own accord. ''If he's the part of me that helps me become 'lively', as you put it...if we're reunited, then does that mean I'll be remembered?''

His voice seemed to carry hope in it. Miku felt cool fingers rest lightly on her shoulder, and she glanced back at Len - ''Tell him yes,'' incorporeal Len whispered. ''Tell him that, the moment we're together again, he will get back his life. His spark. Everything that made him who he was, instead of this empty vessel he's now living as. That's why I had to find him. Why he had to find me. Why he feels so empty now.''

''I...I can see him?'' at the same time, the other Len said, sounding confused. ''When he touched you, I saw him...'' his eyes met the gaze of his spirit half. ''Is that why?'' Len asked softly. ''Can I see you only when you touch Miku?'' the question was directed at himself, instead of at the teal haired girl. The other him seemed to hesitate for a moment - finally, he shrugged, nodding slowly. Like he wasn't very sure.

_Like she's a conduit...a connector of some sort. But why? Why go through all the trouble of getting a conduit? It makes no sense...what's our connection, what is it that binds the three of us together? _''We need to think,'' he finally said, attracting all attention to himself. For once. He rarely was paid any attention - most people overlooked him, like he wasn't there. Like he was invisible. Incorporeal. _A spirit..._

He had to wonder why he was taking all this so calmly. Because of how hollow he felt? Because he always felt so empty, so lifeless, like there was something important missing from him? He didn't feel sceptical about this at all - and that was strange, since Len didn't usually believe in spirits, and an Afterlife, and whatnot. But...he doubted that this was fake. He knew, somehow, even against his own logic, that this was not a lie. That Miku Hatsune was not lying to him.

''Do you know how to join us together again?'' he asked Miku, though his eyes never left his other half. ''Do you know what will happen...if the two of us were to be reunited?'' it was an important question. From what he had seen earlier, the spirit him was attracted to Miku. Did that explain his own attraction to her, or was Len himself simply curious about her past?

If they were reunited...would he fall for Miku, if he really wasn't attracted to her presently? If he was attracted to her, if the spirit Len retained his own consciousness and personality, if the two of them became two people sharing one body...what would happen, then? Would they both want Miku? Would they both love her? Would there be two people in his head, instead of one? Just like a split personality disorder...

''I have no idea -'' Miku's words were cut off as someone opened the door to Miku's house, startling all three of them. Len could still see his other half, as the spirit Len had yet to stop holding on to Miku's shoulder. The trio turned to stare at the kitchen doorway, wondering who had come into the house. Luka? Gakupo? But Miku knew they both had to work...

''Miku, sweetie, I'm back from work early. I decided to leave earlier today, so we can have a little heart-to-heart talk with each other -'' Luka's familiar voice rang through the house, before the pink haired woman herself walked into the kitchen. At the sight of the people before her, Luka gasped, cutting her own words off as she paused, staring at the scene.

Miku met her adoptive mother's icy blue gaze, wondering how she could explain away the presence of a boy in the house - but Luka shook her head, her blue eyes narrowing slightly. To Miku's shock, Luka spoke to Len, and from the way the blond boy's eyes widened, she knew that he was feeling surprised as well.

''So you're finally here, Len Kagamine...it took you long enough.''

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_**Solitaryloner: **__This chapter is so sucky. I don't...ugh. It's not good. There should have been more 'oomph' when Len found out about the whole spirit thing, but then the real Len is really unemotional and stuff so I can't make him surprised and all...it's so frustrating!_

_And the ending is crappy it sounds so...fake. What was I thinking. I have plans for this story, but it's not working with me here..._

_Review please? If anyone even cares enough to leave a review for this crappy...thing. Thanks._


	14. Chapter 14

_**Solitaryloner: **__Okay, so I don't normally do this, but - Amy, right? - requested that I do a shout-out to her, so...well, here you go. Hi. I don't know what else to say, other than that I'm sorry for the loss of your grandfather._

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Confused was one way to describe the way Miku was feeling, at that particular moment.

''Luka...?'' she whispered, looking from her pink haired adoptive mother to Len, who was gazing back at Luka, a similar look of uncertainty in his dark blue eyes. Miku was sure they both had never encountered each other before - so how on Earth did Luka know who he was? Slowly, Miku turned and exchanged a look with the spirit Len. He looked as confused as she did.

Her mother glanced at her, those light blue eyes calm. It wasn't the reaction she expected Luka to have, upon seeing an unfamiliar boy in the kitchen. ''I was wondering how long it would take for him to finally find his other half,'' she tilted her head in the direction of the ghostly Len. He skittered back, shock evident on his face - and on Miku's own as well, she was sure.

Luka could see...Len? But she had never said anything about him before. Didn't it mean that she knew...she knew that what Miku thought of as 'hallucinations' was anything but so? ''What's going on?'' Miku whispered, more to herself than to anyone else in the room. ''Luka, you never said anything before!'' she met her gaze, wondering if all this was simply a dream.

It felt so surreal. Luka let out an audible sigh, her eyes flicking between the three people in the room. She wondered whether now was a suitable time to tell them...who she was. Who Gakupo was. The reason the both of them had adopted Miku, all those years ago, despite her being the strangest child in the orphanage. Did Miku know that, in actual fact, she and Gakupo were _not _husband and wife? No, she didn't...

She glanced at the incorporeal boy standing next to her adopted daughter, shock still evident on his face. Len Kagamine. Or, at least, the spirit half of him. The dying half of him. The blood covering him was not eternally replenish-able, despite what he thought - there was less now, but if the blood ever ran out, he would fade away from existence. His blood was like the sand in an hourglass, slowly trickling away.

The other Len, the physical one, was standing some distance away from all of them. There were faint traces of surprise on his face as he stared intently at her, obviously wondering how she knew who he was. She could see that he was empty, that he had no aura - because the one who would fulfil him was not there. She didn't have any idea what colour his aura was, which intrigued her greatly. He was strange.

And her daughter...Miku Hatsune looked very confused. But who could blame her? Luka liked her very much - her aura was so beautiful, like molten gold. They couldn't help being attracted to people with golden auras, she and Gakupo both - in their line of work, they were jaded to human morality. Human kindness. It was never as real as how people pretended it was. Only the golden ones were really ever truly kind.

''I can see Len, yes,'' she said simply, staring at Miku intently, studying her for her reaction. Her green eyes widened, her fingers reaching out to latch firmly around Len's wrist. The incorporeal Len, that was. It was as though she was trying to seek comfort from his touch...Luka knew about the existence of the spirit Len, but she hadn't known that he had any relationship with her daughter. That would complicate things.

She frowned at the possible implications which might come about. ''Why didn't you tell me he wasn't a hallucination?'' Miku asked, her gaze still disbelieving. ''I mean...all along, I thought there was something wrong with me! People thought I was a schizophrenic, that I was mad and that if they stayed around me, I would hurt them. Even the doctor said...why didn't you say _something? _To prove that I wasn't insane?''

_Why did she and Gakupo ask the doctor to do a check-up on me, if she knew that all along, he wasn't a hallucination? That Len was real? I spent so many years thinking that there was something wrong...I tried so hard to believe that I wasn't insane, that so long as I took my medicines, I could be as normal as anyone else. Why didn't they ever say anything to me?_

Miku just couldn't help feeling betrayed by her adoptive mother's silence. Luka sighed again, looking slightly impatient. ''You are not normal, Miku,'' she said pointedly, making her freeze. ''You never were. Not since the accident. Why else do you think we adopted you, Gakupo and I? We were supposed to wait till the day you realised he was real,'' she waved a hand at Len. ''We could not help you in any way, Miku.''

''I'm normal!'' Miku insisted, her grip on Len's wrist tightening. He slung an arm around her shoulders, hugging her close to him. She looked at the other Len - he was observing this coolly, like a simple bystander, witnessing some kind of fascinating experiment. The surprise on his face had long faded, becoming the look of neutrality she was better used to. She didn't know whether that irritated her or not.

''You are not,'' at this, Luka's voice hardened. A little, only a little, but it was enough to make her pause. ''Normal people don't have a free soul attached to them. Even a human should be able to perceive that,'' the way Luka said human made her sound like..._isn't she human too? _''We had no choice but to stand by, and pretend to be concerned mortals. Worrying about the health of their child. But we knew you were sane.''

''I'm sane?'' Len had never heard so much relief before. In those two words, he suddenly knew how much she feared that she was not...like other people. How different she was. He looked away from the tealette, looking at the other him - the bloodstained him - who was holding on to Miku. That other him was paying more attention to Luka than to himself, and Len had to wonder...why were they so different?

They were one and the same person, yet they were as different as night and day. Even their eyes reflected that. Where his eyes were the dark blue of a midnight sky, _his _eyes were a bright cerulean blue. Why was someone who wasn't physical, who didn't have an actual _body, _more...alive than him? It was unfair, almost. But he wasn't the kind of person to whine on about how unfair life was. Life was always unfair.

He had always known that Miku was sane, no matter how abnormal she seemed to be. She didn't have the light of lunacy in her eyes. Len knew what it was like, to be insane. He had a classmate once, who was diagnosed with severe schizophrenia - the way he spoke gibberish, the way he stared balefully at Len, as though Len was some hated enemy instead of an acquaintance...he would never forget it.

The boy went to school, since he had medicine to suppress his condition. Maybe he forgot to take it one day, Len would never be sure, but that very day, he tried to kill Len. It was on that day, the very day he looked Death in the eye - with those fingers wrapped around his neck, squeezing until he was gasping for air - that he knew he would never fit in. He stared into the face of lunacy, and came out...very different.

He was always different. But that changed him more. His coldness...he had been aloof before, but that incident left him cold. He was strangely fascinated by the idea of Death - he didn't really believe in spirits or the like then, but the very thought of the void that came with passing on wouldn't let him go. The idea of death gripped him tight in its talons, and he couldn't escape.

He didn't want to escape. No one knew about his slightly morbid interest. After all, there was no one for him to speak with. But Len didn't fear death, the thought of entering oblivion. In fact, he thought it would be good. To leave, and go somewhere he wasn't ignored...a thought he nursed so much, he almost forgot about the way it lurked in his heart. He had forgotten.

Viewing his spirit made the thought come back. He wasn't sure if he still didn't mind dying - as a child, he had feared it, since he watched Miku's parents die right before his very eyes - but he was jaded and numb towards this sensitive topic now. His spirit...did he still wish to leave, though? Now that he knew he was no longer gone? If his spirit was reunited with him, then he would _no longer be ignored. _Wouldn't he?

He wished, so badly, that he could hope. The faint wish, the barely-there longing, flickered to life within his heart. But it was so small that it was practically negligible - like a tiny flame on the tip of a matchstick, trying to melt the ice of the Arctic Circle. Hopeless. Futile. The flame was stamped out, and he was left feeling cold again. He wondered if it was because his spirit wasn't with him. His spirit, his soul...it was gone.

And hadn't Miku mentioned, somehow, some time, that his soul was the source of all his emotions? If Len got his soul back, then maybe he would be able to feel again. Feel hope. A tiny shred, a pathetic flicker, to try and melt the icy frost that covered him. He was so tired of being dead that he no longer minded his numbness. Sometimes, being numb felt almost...good. He didn't have to feel. Didn't have to worry at all.

_But I don't want to be passed over anymore. Don't want to be treated like an insignificant being, worth no one's attention. _Len sighed, and at once, all eyes shifted over to him. He blinked at that - he was unused to being paid so much...attention. Usually, he felt as though he could be shouting at the top of his voice, and people would just continue walking past him, as though he wasn't there. Like he didn't exist.

''Len?'' Miku whispered, meeting his gaze. She had the loveliest green eyes he had ever seen. Not that he saw eyes of that colour very much. Like a summer forest. Her eyes reminded him of summer. It used to be his favourite season, in the past. Until the accident happened - it had taken place in summer. The fire, the deaths...after that, he didn't like summer anymore.

Her eyes were pretty, though. Summer leaves. Len blinked, glancing back at Miku's adoptive mother - he was fairly certain that this woman was the one who had adopted Miku, though he hadn't heard them address each other as parent and child yet - and wondered who she was. He was logical. He knew that she ought not to have any idea who he was. So...why did she know his name, and how could she see his other side?

''Who are you?'' he asked, his voice bland. Len knew that he had a pleasant-sounding voice, though it was admittedly rather...unemotional. He could sound curious, but he wondered why he should even bother. After all, it wasn't like emotions were needed to survive, right? True, he would like to have them back - but then there was no point to pretending that he could feel if he was not able to do so, in the end.

Len had never been someone who was fond of doing pointless things. It came with being so logical - he couldn't get rid of his own cynicism. He was a curious puzzle, even to himself - he wanted things at some times, and didn't want them at others. Did that make him a paradox, an oxymoron, something made to confound and bewilder others? Perhaps yes. Perhaps not.

The woman, Luka, turned to face him, her light blue eyes regarding him calmly. He couldn't help thinking that those blue eyes were familiar, like he had seen them before somewhere. ''Who I am is not important for now,'' she said, serene and unruffled. ''You, Len Kagamine, are of far more interest at this point of time - or so I feel. And I would like to see whether you are truly worthy of my help,'' she smiled graciously.

Unbidden, he felt his eyes narrow. ''And what gives you the authority to decide whether or not I am worthy of help?'' an obvious challenge, though the words were said as tonelessly as ever. ''I am rather curious about it - how would you know if I deserve it or not? And why should I believe you, in the end? I don't know you.''

Luka just continued smiling. ''Oh, Len, you can believe me,'' she said easily. ''I won't be the one deciding whether you're worthy or not...'' she stepped to the side, revealing someone behind her - Len's gaze drifted to the other person, and at once his eyes widened. Familiar blue eyes met his, shoulder-length blonde hair framing a pretty, elfin face - it was him. Yet it wasn't.

A girl...she stared back at him, her gaze as calm and placid as Len's own. ''Your death will be the one to decide,'' Luka finished, leaving Len to stare at the girl. Someone who looked just like him, yet wasn't him. He felt an instant sense of connection to her, though he didn't know who she was - though he had never seen her before in his entire life. She was a familiar stranger.

''My name is Rin Kagamine,'' the girl spoke, her voice making everyone jump - it was chilling, like the sound of a tomb sliding open. ''And I am Len Kagamine's death,'' her eyes fixed upon his. She smiled a cold smile. ''I am your death.''

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_**Solitaryloner: **__Okay, I updated. So now I'll be going back to hide in my cave for another few weeks or so. I'll be back when I'm in the mood. Until then! Please drop a review, by the way - I'm really close to the 100 review mark._


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